# Essex Boys Porsche



## barsnack (Mar 12, 2011)




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## Lois1981 (Mar 29, 2012)

Haha is this a video of some drunken football hooligans walking over a Porsche lol the video won't play for me "not available in your country"


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## spod (Mar 25, 2010)

Brilliant! :thumb:


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## DanishM (Dec 15, 2013)

Lois1981 said:


> Haha is this a video of some drunken football hooligans walking over a Porsche lol the video won't play for me "not available in your country"


It's Joey from Friends with Porsche clothing and everything on pretending to own one lol.


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## Heavyassweights (Jan 18, 2014)

Ha


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## Ken Hutchinson (May 29, 2009)

Classic on both counts


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## saxondale (Nov 11, 2012)

Plus no one likes that purple color he claims his is


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## Mal20729 (Mar 1, 2014)

barsnack said:


>


And the award for funniest thread so far goes to.... Hahaha


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## UkWardy (Mar 30, 2014)

Haha! brilliant!


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## sneeky_dave (Apr 2, 2013)

Hahaha love it. And spits his dummy out in 3,2,1


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## Ads749r (Jan 20, 2014)

I have the exact same car.


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## essexboy (Sep 7, 2008)

barsnack said:


>


Nearly but I Dont keep mine under cover.Is that really the best you can do?


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## Dirk McQuickly (Dec 29, 2010)

very funny! reps


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## saxondale (Nov 11, 2012)

Ads749r said:


> I have the exact same car.


Picsornopurpleporsche


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## Sigma (Apr 13, 2014)

You're too old for a porsche. You should go for something that will compliment grampa smell better like a bentley con. Gt


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## Heavyassweights (Jan 18, 2014)

essexboy said:


> Nearly but I Dont keep mine under cover.Is that really the best you can do?


nice car

did the owner chase you off after seeing you running all over it and taking pics?


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## Sams (Nov 3, 2013)

Essexboy you should be happy about this thread and it multiplies the effect you wanted from your original thread - More people know you own a Porsche now


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## Heavyassweights (Jan 18, 2014)

Sams said:


> Essexboy you should be happy about this thread and it multiplies the effect you wanted from your original thread - More people know you own a Porsche now


does he? Only a pic inside the car will suffice as proof

UKM rules


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## Sams (Nov 3, 2013)

Heavyassweights said:


> does he? Only a pic inside the car will suffice as proof
> 
> UKM rules


Good point, I bet he just walks past the car on the way to work in the morning


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## EctoSize (Nov 28, 2013)

Heavyassweights said:


> does he? Only a pic inside the car will suffice as proof
> 
> UKM rules


Thought you needed a sign with your UKM user name written on it and a copy of today's paper as well!


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## Del Boy 01 (Dec 19, 2012)

Heavyassweights said:


> does he? Only a pic inside the car will suffice as proof
> 
> UKM rules


*googles hire a Porsche*


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## Heavyassweights (Jan 18, 2014)

Del Boy 01 said:


> *googles hire a Porsche*


or "photoshop courses in my area"


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## G-man99 (Jul 15, 2008)

Heavyassweights said:


> does he? Only a pic inside the car will suffice as proof
> 
> UKM rules


Or etch his name across the bonnet (boot) and then a double thumbs up pic of him next to it


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## Gary29 (Aug 21, 2011)

EctoSize said:


> Thought you needed a sign with your UKM user name written on it and a copy of today's paper as well!





G-man99 said:


> Or etch his name across the bonnet (boot) and then a double thumbs up pic of him next to it


Or have some custom trainers made with 'UKM' moulded into the sole, then walk through a muddy puddle and onto the bonnet of the car, next to the Porsche badge and post a pic of the footprint left behind.


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## barsnack (Mar 12, 2011)

think Essex Boy should take his key and scrap 'ukm' into the paint, just so we know its his


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## essexboy (Sep 7, 2008)

barsnack said:


> think Essex Boy should take his key and scrap 'ukm' into the paint, just so we know its his


Shame this didnt happen 3 weeks ago, before I painted the bonnet.I would have done.It might have shut you up.I really dont have the desire to prove anything.Imagine what would have been the response, if I put up a pic of my Ferrari.


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## Sams (Nov 3, 2013)

essexboy said:


> Shame this didnt happen 3 weeks ago, before I painted the bonnet.I would have done.It might have shut you up.I really dont have the desire to prove anything.Imagine what would have been the response, if I put up a pic of my Ferrari.


You have a Ferrari ?

Thats a massive game changer.

We need pics or shall we wait for the thread 'Birds keeping sh1tting on my Ferrari, whats the best way to stop this'


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## Smitch (Dec 29, 2008)

The guy has got a 996, you can pick up a half decent one for £10k, why wouldn't he own one?


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## barsnack (Mar 12, 2011)

essexboy said:


> Shame this didnt happen 3 weeks ago, before I painted the bonnet.I would have done.It might have shut you up.I really dont have the desire to prove anything.Imagine what would have been the response, if I put up a pic of my Ferrari.


yes you have a Ferrari, just like OJ didn't kill his wife, Muscle food chicken always arrives fresh, Chelsea deserved to win the Champions League, Lorian really exists, Laurie was straight...you get the drift Cupcake


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## RACK (Aug 20, 2007)

Smitch said:


> The guy has got a 996, you can pick up a half decent one for £10k, why wouldn't he own one?


This X2

Would love a 996 but other things to get at the min

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Porsche-911-Carrera-2-996-/161308109136?pt=Automobiles_UK&hash=item258eb66950#ht_348wt_922

Think I've missed why people are doubting Essexboy having a Porsche


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## Sams (Nov 3, 2013)

Smitch said:


> The guy has got a 996, you can pick up a half decent one for £10k, why wouldn't he own one?


Really, on what kind of mileage ?

just looked at link 75k

would really want a X reg though


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## sneeky_dave (Apr 2, 2013)

It's no audi all over again


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## essexboy (Sep 7, 2008)

sneeky_dave said:


> It's no audi all over again


Apart from the fact that I actually own the car.So not really then is it?


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## Ian_Montrose (Nov 13, 2007)

essexboy said:


> Apart from the fact that I actually own the car.So not really then is it?


Don't let facts get in the way of a good old witch hunt, You old spoilsport you.


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## PurpleOnes (Oct 17, 2013)

I wonder how long did it take to set those carboard boxes to the shape of a Porche :tongue:


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## biglbs (Jan 26, 2012)

It is a boxster...


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## Sigma (Apr 13, 2014)

biglbs said:


> It is a boxster...


Excuse me? Are you calling my southern friend a transvestite?? Lmao :laugh:


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## biglbs (Jan 26, 2012)

Sigma said:


> Excuse me? Are you calling my southern friend a transvestite?? Lmao :laugh:


Oi i am in Essex too ,toilet breath! :blowme:


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## Sigma (Apr 13, 2014)

biglbs said:


> Oi i am in Essex too ,toilet breath! :blowme:


Oh! There's two of em......anymore lurking about?

J/k


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## Sams (Nov 3, 2013)

Sigma said:


> Oh! There's two of em......anymore lurking about?
> 
> J/k


Yes one more. But I don't own a Porsche


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## biglbs (Jan 26, 2012)

Oh yes ,we do travel:cool2:


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## biglbs (Jan 26, 2012)

Sams said:


> Yes one more. But I don't own a Porsche


Nor do i,i have two RR..


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## Sams (Nov 3, 2013)

biglbs said:


> Nor do i,i have two RR..


I own one Clio 1.6 but it does have 4 gears


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## Sigma (Apr 13, 2014)

Hey you might not own a Porsche bit at least you still have those epic accents.

I love a fit essex bird with the accent they're so hideously white trash it's actually rather arousing.

Went to that fancy pub in chigwell a while back, king - something, teeming with pompous skanks it was - an oxymoron in every sense of the word they were.

...and as for the little joey essex types....no way are all these bird brains earning their own dough. Was all I was thinking.

Edit: King William pub :beer:

Is that where you hang out @essexboy?


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## essexboy (Sep 7, 2008)

Sigma said:


> Hey you might not own a Porsche bit at least you still have those epic accents.
> 
> I love a fit essex bird with the accent they're so hideously white trash it's actually rather arousing.
> 
> ...


No mate.Not my scene.


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## essexboy (Sep 7, 2008)

biglbs said:


> It is a boxster...


996.


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## Heavyassweights (Jan 18, 2014)

essexboy said:


> 996.


Do we get a pic with you in it?


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## biglbs (Jan 26, 2012)

essexboy said:


> 996.


No in the OP mate:lol:


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## PortsladeMan (Mar 20, 2014)

essexboy said:


> Nearly but I Dont keep mine under cover.Is that really the best you can do?


What year/specific model is this mate and what is insurance like?


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## essexboy (Sep 7, 2008)

biglbs said:


> No in the OP mate:lol:


Sorry i dont understand?


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## essexboy (Sep 7, 2008)

PortsladeMan said:


> What year/specific model is this mate and what is insurance like?


2003 3.6S tip.Ive a trade policy, so it doesnt matter to me.


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## essexboy (Sep 7, 2008)

Heavyassweights said:


> Do we get a pic with you in it?


No.


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## sneeky_dave (Apr 2, 2013)

Check Out My Subaru:


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## essexboy (Sep 7, 2008)

sneeky_dave said:


> Check Out My Subaru:


Very nice.


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## PHMG (Jun 15, 2010)

This is brilliant the way the Essex boy is biting.

I'd be out driving the thing...not arguing with people over if i really have it or not.

#LegitPicsOrRandomPorsche


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## essexboy (Sep 7, 2008)

PHMG said:


> This is brilliant the way the Essex boy is biting.
> 
> I'd be out driving the thing...not arguing with people over if i really have it or not.
> 
> #LegitPicsOrRandomPorsche


Biting? Nah not me.


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## Sams (Nov 3, 2013)

It's pretty obvious he hasn't got one, we have had our fun so leave him be


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## Heavyassweights (Jan 18, 2014)

Simple pic of u and ur mrs in the car and u can stop biting


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## Adz (Jan 29, 2008)

essexboy said:


> 2003 3.6S tip.Ive a trade policy, so it doesnt matter to me.


Serious question, are you a regular buyer of Porsche's?

If so, I might be able to send some your way.


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## Dazza (Aug 7, 2010)

It's PORSCHE!!!!!!!!!!!


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## essexboy (Sep 7, 2008)

Heavyassweights said:


> Simple pic of u and ur mrs in the car and u can stop biting


Im happy to play along.Might be a problem with the pic of the mrs though.Last I heard she was in Australia.She might be home by now, as it was 1996.


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## essexboy (Sep 7, 2008)

Adz The Rat said:


> Serious question, are you a regular buyer of Porsche's?
> 
> If so, I might be able to send some your way.


Hi Adz.No not really.The problem is that most buyers, would rather spend a few grand more, and buy from a specialist.Its very difficult to shift these in the a/trader, unless you want to give watertight warranties.As you may know the 996, has a few inherent issues, which can cause catastrophic engine failure.Resulting in 8/10k of engine rebuild.I bought this at auction and despite no major issues, Ive still spent 2k on it in the last year, and ive done a lot of work myself.Id be in the market for 993s sub 20k, which are few and far between.

I had a plug change last month, plus oil feeder pipe fix.That was £410.My mates 993 service bill was £2700!

The only reason im using it, is because it owes me about £1500 more than its worth.So if I use it for a while, it takes the sting out of the loss.


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## Adz (Jan 29, 2008)

essexboy said:


> Hi Adz.No not really.The problem is that most buyers, would rather spend a few grand more, and buy from a specialist.Its very difficult to shift these in the a/trader, unless you want to give watertight warranties.As you may know the 996, has a few inherent issues, which can cause catastrophic engine failure.Resulting in 8/10k of engine rebuild.I bought this at auction and despite no major issues, Ive still spent 2k on it in the last year, and ive done a lot of work myself.Id be in the market for 993s sub 20k, which are few and far between.
> 
> I had a plug change last month, plus oil feeder pipe fix.That was £410.My mates 993 service bill was £2700!
> 
> The only reason im using it, is because it owes me about £1500 more than its worth.So if I use it for a while, it takes the sting out of the loss.


Ah no worries dude, Im in the trade too so get a lot of Porsches, mainly 997's to be honest.

993 values have gone silly, like all air-cooled Porsches!

If I can help with anything with these cars, just give me a shout


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## essexboy (Sep 7, 2008)

Adz The Rat said:


> Ah no worries dude, Im in the trade too so get a lot of Porsches, mainly 997's to be honest.
> 
> 993 values have gone silly, like all air-cooled Porsches!
> 
> If I can help with anything with these cars, just give me a shout


Ta Mate.


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## saxondale (Nov 11, 2012)

essexboy said:


> Hi Adz.No not really.The problem is that most buyers, would rather spend a few grand more, and buy from a specialist.Its very difficult to shift these in the a/trader, unless you want to give watertight warranties.As you may know the 996, has a few inherent issues, which can cause catastrophic engine failure.Resulting in 8/10k of engine rebuild.I bought this at auction and despite no major issues, Ive still spent 2k on it in the last year, and ive done a lot of work myself.Id be in the market for 993s sub 20k, which are few and far between.
> 
> I had a plug change last month, plus oil feeder pipe fix.That was £410.My mates 993 service bill was £2700!
> 
> The only reason im using it, is because it owes me about £1500 more than its worth.So if I use it for a while, it takes the sting out of the loss.


Ah, so not actually your porsche then, it is noaudi all over again!!!


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## essexboy (Sep 7, 2008)

saxondale said:


> Ah, so not actually your porsche then, it is noaudi all over again!!!


I paid for it with my money.I drive it.Pretty sure that makes it mine.


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## saxondale (Nov 11, 2012)

essexboy said:


> I paid for it with my money.I drive it.Pretty sure that makes it mine.


Sorry if i got that wrong, you're post suggested you were motor trade


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## barsnack (Mar 12, 2011)

essexboy said:


> I paid for it with my money.I drive it.Pretty sure that makes it mine.


you could say the same about slavery


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## biglbs (Jan 26, 2012)

essexboy said:


> Sorry i dont understand?


Watch the Op video...it is a BOXster lol


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## IGotTekkers (Jun 6, 2012)

Another case of barsnack disbelieving anybody that has more than him I see


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## grant hunter (Apr 21, 2009)

IGotTekkers said:


> Another case of barsnack disbelieving anybody that has more than him I see


Your just jealous he's moved on from picking on you


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## IGotTekkers (Jun 6, 2012)

grant hunter said:


> Your just jealous he's moved on from picking on you


He could never pick on me, I'm bigger than him


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## grant hunter (Apr 21, 2009)

IGotTekkers said:


> He could never pick on me, I'm bigger than him


You won't be saying that when it's 4am and he's shacking your ****ing caravan shouting "where is your 10 grand" haha

The dude does seem abit possessive.


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## Sams (Nov 3, 2013)

IGotTekkers said:


> He could never pick on me, I'm bigger than him


Sounds like your calling Barsnack out to a fight to the death to me


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## IGotTekkers (Jun 6, 2012)

grant hunter said:


> You won't be saying that when it's 4am and he's shacking your ****ing caravan shouting "where is your 10 grand" haha
> 
> The dude does seem abit possessive.


Haha I'm a bit skint atm so I'd just have to fight him off with some loose change :lol:


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## Sams (Nov 3, 2013)

IGotTekkers said:


> Haha I'm a bit skint atm so I'd just have to fight him off with some loose change :lol:


You a drug dealer tekks? how much is there?


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## Gary29 (Aug 21, 2011)

Sams said:


> You a drug dealer tekks? how much is there?


I'll guess first, 2 large?

@IGotTekkers?


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## Andy Dee (Jun 1, 2008)

IGotTekkers said:


> Haha I'm a bit skint atm so I'd just have to fight him off with some loose change :lol:


you didnt have to go to wonga just to look loaded mate out of principle. You any idea how much you will have to pay them fkcers back now.


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## IGotTekkers (Jun 6, 2012)

Sams said:


> You a drug dealer tekks? how much is there?


 Lol no I'm not



Gary29 said:


> I'll guess first, 2 large?
> 
> @IGotTekkers?


No idea mate iv not counted, it's just what was laying in my bits and bobs box.


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## IGotTekkers (Jun 6, 2012)

andysutils said:


> you didnt have to go to wonga just to look loaded mate out of principle. You any idea how much you will have to pay them fkcers back now.


I can't even get a provvy loan mate my credits that bad lol.


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## Sams (Nov 3, 2013)

IGotTekkers said:


> I can't even get a provvy loan mate my credits that bad lol.


How can your credit be that bad and you have so much cash lying about ?

Must be a drug dealer ? or how do you have that much cash lying about in your 'bits and bobs' box ?

Answer all of the above please


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## Gary29 (Aug 21, 2011)

Sams said:


> How can your credit be that bad and you have so much cash lying about ?
> 
> Must be a drug dealer ? or how do you have that much cash lying about in your 'bits and bobs' box ?
> 
> Answer all of the above please


My 'bits and bobs' box has got a load of copper 1's and 2's in there, couple of paper clips and an elastic band, certainly doesn't have a big wedge of 20's in it.


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## Huntingground (Jan 10, 2010)

Sams said:


> How can your credit be that bad and you have so much cash lying about ?
> 
> Must be a drug dealer ? or how do you have that much cash lying about in your 'bits and bobs' box ?
> 
> Answer all of the above please


You want somebody to admit on a public webpage that they are a drug dealer. Get a grip.


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## IGotTekkers (Jun 6, 2012)

Sams said:


> How can your credit be that bad and you have so much cash lying about ?
> 
> Must be a drug dealer ? or how do you have that much cash lying about in your 'bits and bobs' box ?
> 
> Answer all of the above please


How about suck me off.

If you look at posts I have made on ukm you would see that I know a fair bit about business and marketing and Internet trades and i have helped and advised many people through pm and on the boards. To say it's just 'drug dealing' is insulting.

If you only deem financial success a product of drugs then you need to hang around in better circles mate


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## IGotTekkers (Jun 6, 2012)

Gary29 said:


> My 'bits and bobs' box has got a load of copper 1's and 2's in there, couple of paper clips and an elastic band, certainly doesn't have a big wedge of 20's in it.


You wanna put some more hours in then mate :lol:


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## Sams (Nov 3, 2013)

Huntingground said:


> You want somebody to admit on a public webpage that they are a drug dealer. Get a grip.


Ok I will Pm him, going to We Are FSTVL at the weekend and would be handy to get a few bits in


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## Huntingground (Jan 10, 2010)

Sams said:


> Ok I will Pm him, going to We Are FSTVL at the weekend and would be handy to get a few bits in


You are going to ask DianabolMan for reccy drugs? Maybe the name may give the game away


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## GetYucky (Nov 5, 2012)

tekks can you message me back man?


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## essexboy (Sep 7, 2008)

saxondale said:


> Sorry if i got that wrong, you're post suggested you were motor trade


I am? I still have to buy em,I dont get them given to me!!


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## essexboy (Sep 7, 2008)

barsnack said:


> you could say the same about slavery


Yeah sure you could.How relevant slavery is to car ownership is, Ive no idea.Im sure somewhere in that vast cranium of yours, youll find a way to believe it.


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## essexboy (Sep 7, 2008)

Sams said:


> It's pretty obvious he hasn't got one, we have had our fun so leave him be


If your so confident in your conviction.If I prove conclusively that the car in question is owned by me, will you agree to donate £50 to Help for Heros?.Ill willingly take picture or inconvience myself if a good cause is going to benefit.Id ask snack bar, but he doesnt know what £50 is.


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## hermie07 (Sep 16, 2008)

essexboy said:


> If your so confident in your conviction.If I prove conclusively that the car in question is owned by me, will you agree to donate £50 to Help for Heros?.Ill willingly take picture or inconvience myself if a good cause is going to benefit.Id ask snack bar, but he doesnt know what £50 is.


BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM


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## Sigma (Apr 13, 2014)

essexboy said:


> If your so confident in your conviction.If I prove conclusively that the car in question is owned by me, will you agree to donate £50 to Help for Heros?.Ill willingly take picture or inconvience myself if a good cause is going to benefit.Id ask snack bar, but he doesnt know what £50 is.


Wow. Comeback of the week


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## sneeky_dave (Apr 2, 2013)

Hook, line and sinker


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## Gary29 (Aug 21, 2011)

essexboy said:


> If your so confident in your conviction.If I prove conclusively that the car in question is owned by me, will you agree to donate £50 to Help for Heros?.Ill willingly take picture or inconvience myself if a good cause is going to benefit.Id ask snack bar, but he doesnt know what £50 is.


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## PortsladeMan (Mar 20, 2014)

essexboy said:


> 2003 3.6S tip.Ive a trade policy, so it doesnt matter to me.


Nice, I've done a year with no claims. Going to now try get insured on my Dad's A4 tdi at 18... lol


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## Sams (Nov 3, 2013)

essexboy said:


> If your so confident in your conviction.If I prove conclusively that the car in question is owned by me, will you agree to donate £50 to Help for Heros?.Ill willingly take picture or inconvience myself if a good cause is going to benefit.Id ask snack bar, but he doesnt know what £50 is.


haha how much bait can one person take ??

I donate when I see them in the shopping centre with a few quid here and there, not going to donate £50 just to see you borrow a car and take pics.

How about you show me a copy of your driving licence, log book for car in the same name and also a copy of your traders insurance to make it concrete


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## essexboy (Sep 7, 2008)

Sams said:


> haha how much bait can one person take ??
> 
> I donate when I see them in the shopping centre with a few quid here and there, not going to donate £50 just to see you borrow a car and take pics.
> 
> How about you show me a copy of your* driving licence, log book for car in the same name and also a copy of your traders insurance to make it concrete*


Your not getting off the hook that easily.I will agree with your request, and @Diggy can mediate.


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## Andy Dee (Jun 1, 2008)

essexboy said:


> Hows this for starters??


I knew this was coming. Ive been watching this thread for days . nice one haha


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## Sigma (Apr 13, 2014)

It's really cool for him that he has and enjoys driving a Porsche but why are people making such a fuss over this, like a third world kid if they see an Ipad for the first time?

Get a grip guys, it's not like he's just revealed he's keeping an SR71 in his backyard :confused1:


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## essexboy (Sep 7, 2008)

Sigma said:


> It's really cool for him that he has and enjoys driving a Porsche but why are people making such a fuss over this, like a third world kid if they see an Ipad for the first time?
> 
> Get a grip guys, it's not like he's just revealed he's keeping an* SR71 in his backyard* :confused1:


Sh.1t.You know about that then? Are you the c.unt who grassed me to the council?


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## Riddar (Dec 20, 2011)

Sigma said:


> It's really cool for him that he has and enjoys driving a Porsche but why are people making such a fuss over this, like a third world kid if they see an Ipad for the first time?
> 
> Get a grip guys, it's not like he's just revealed he's keeping an SR71 in his backyard :confused1:


They are just winding him up Sigma. Forum banter.


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## IGotTekkers (Jun 6, 2012)

Sigma said:


> It's really cool for him that he has and enjoys driving a Porsche but why are people making such a fuss over this, like a third world kid if they see an Ipad for the first time?
> 
> Get a grip guys, it's not like he's just revealed he's keeping an SR71 in his backyard :confused1:


Jealousy mate. Seems most ukm members are sex less, drive 1 litre fiestas, live in 1 bedroom flats and earn minimum wage, if you claim to have more than that then shiit the bed you had better have proof lmao


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## Leigh (Jun 13, 2012)

essexboy said:


> Your not getting off the hook that easily.I will agree with your request, and @Diggy can mediate.


I'm sure @DiggyV will be delighted. He supports Help the Heroes


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## DiggyV (May 6, 2011)

essexboy said:


> Your not getting off the hook that easily.I will agree with your request, and @Diggy can mediate.


no problem guys.

EB if you want to email me your V5, I can independently validate your name with TinyTom and then post up the results here. No worries, if its help 4 heroes, big supported of the military charities - in fact am walking 100Km from London to Brighton with a target of under 20hrs for Blind Veterans UK at the end of June


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## DiggyV (May 6, 2011)

Leigh L said:


> I'm sure @DiggyV will be delighted. He supports Help the Heroes


thanks hunni :wub:


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## essexboy (Sep 7, 2008)

DiggyV said:


> no problem guys.
> 
> EB if you want to email me your V5, I can independently validate your name with TinyTom and then post up the results here. No worries, if its help 4 heroes, big supported of the military charities - in fact am walking 100Km from London to Brighton with a target of under 20hrs for Blind Veterans UK at the end of June


No problem mate.However,I think we may have a problem getting @Sams to agree.Tell you what mail me your email ,and Ill send you £50 sponsorship for your walk.PP?


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## Heavyassweights (Jan 18, 2014)

essexboy said:


> No problem mate.However,I think we may have a problem getting @Sams to agree.Tell you what mail me your email ,and Ill send you £50 sponsorship for your walk.PP?


Top bloke mate

Now u just have to learn to chillax


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## DiggyV (May 6, 2011)

essexboy said:


> No problem mate.However,I think we may have a problem getting @Sams to agree.Tell you what mail me your email ,and Ill send you £50 sponsorship for your walk.PP?


WOW mate that's super generous. Will PM details across.

:rockon:


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## Sams (Nov 3, 2013)

So all this winding up Essex boy about not having a Porsche has helped for Hero's £50, work here is done and jokes aside I have to say pretty generous.

I won't be donating £50 though I'm just here for the banter and give donations when I can so I'm good thanks


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## Heavyassweights (Jan 18, 2014)

Sams said:


> So all this winding up Essex boy about not having a Porsche has helped for Hero's £50, work here is done and jokes aside I have to say pretty generous.
> 
> I won't be donating £50 though I'm just here for the banter and give donations when I can so I'm good thanks


The white flag has been waved


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## squatthis (May 3, 2010)

Sams said:


> So all this winding up Essex boy about not having a Porsche has helped for Hero's £50, work here is done and jokes aside I have to say pretty generous.
> 
> I won't be donating £50 though I'm just here for the banter and give donations when I can so I'm good thanks


poor form.


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## essexboy (Sep 7, 2008)

Sams said:


> So all this *winding up Essex boy* about not having a Porsche has helped for Hero's £50, work here is done and jokes aside I have to say pretty generous.
> 
> I won't be donating £50 though I'm just here for the banter and give donations when I can so I'm good thanks


Sorry to disappoint.However,I admire your effort.


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## Heavyassweights (Jan 18, 2014)

Did you double bluff?

Whens the pic coming


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## saxondale (Nov 11, 2012)

essexboy said:


> I am? I still have to buy em,I dont get them given to me!!


Meh


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## essexboy (Sep 7, 2008)

Heavyassweights said:


> Did you double bluff?
> 
> Whens the pic coming


Put up £50 for help for heroes and youll have all the proof you want..........


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## Heavyassweights (Jan 18, 2014)

essexboy said:


> Put up £50 for help for heroes and youll have all the proof you want..........


100 quid and you give me car for the wknd


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## essexboy (Sep 7, 2008)

Heavyassweights said:


> 100 quid and you give me car for the wknd


I would but it doesnt exist does it!!


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## saxondale (Nov 11, 2012)

A car dealer crowing about owning a nice car means nothing, does it? Its just a tool of the trade.


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## sneeky_dave (Apr 2, 2013)

That's a cheap way of saving face for claiming you drive a car you don't own


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## barsnack (Mar 12, 2011)

IGotTekkers said:


> Jealousy mate. Seems most ukm members are sex less, drive 1 litre fiestas, live in 1 bedroom flats and earn minimum wage, if you claim to have more than that then shiit the bed you had better have proof lmao


Things slow in Narnia tonight?


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## IGotTekkers (Jun 6, 2012)

barsnack said:


> Things slow in Narnia tonight?


No mate iv been flat out actually just about finishing up my emails and counting up all the money's iv made tonight


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## DiggyV (May 6, 2011)

sneeky_dave said:


> That's a cheap way of saving face for claiming you drive a car you don't own


Trouble is, I know he does ...


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## nWo (Mar 25, 2014)

I can't believe something so trivial has spanned over 9 fúcking pages :lol: Who gives a toss if the fella really drives said car or not? I get that some people are just having a banter, but in general there's too much interest in other people's lives going on ITT...


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## SwAn1 (Jun 4, 2012)

This thread is cringeworthy there's 50% of posters that know its all a windup and not meant serious and there's still some taking the banter literally. It's hands over the face hide behind the sofa cringeworth


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## essexboy (Sep 7, 2008)

SwAn1 said:


> This thread is cringeworthy there's 50% of posters that know its all a windup and not meant serious and there's still some taking the banter literally. It's hands over the face hide behind the sofa cringeworth


Just wait till I post pics of the Ferrari.


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## Tonk007 (Jan 1, 2012)

essexboy said:


> I am? I still have to buy em,I dont get them given to me!!


Pmsl


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## saxondale (Nov 11, 2012)

Wow, a car trader ownes a car! Be like me posting a picture of my new battery drill, now, if he said he owned a helicopter - that would be something


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## Dirk McQuickly (Dec 29, 2010)

saxondale said:


> Wow, a car trader ownes a car! Be like me posting a picture of my new battery drill, now, if he said he owned a helicopter - that would be something


I own a helicopter


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## Andy Dee (Jun 1, 2008)

sneeky_dave said:


> That's a cheap way of saving face for claiming you drive a car you don't own


I knew he did, thats why i didnt say anything and now everyone on 9 pages of bollox dont want to admit what complete and utter knobs they all look lol.

Pathetic really. I mean what reason is there to believe someone doesnt own a Porsche?


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## Double J (Nov 1, 2009)

Laughing hard here.....

Yeah it's a Porsche badge but the cars worth the price of a 5 year old focus ffs what's the big deal either way?

Some people take the internet far too seriously lol

Still at least a worthy cause benefitted by £50....with maybe more to come :lol:


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## essexboy (Sep 7, 2008)

Double J said:


> Laughing hard here.....
> 
> Yeah it's a Porsche badge but the cars worth the price of a 5 year old focus ffs what's the big deal either way?
> 
> ...


The man at Dagenham motors, must love you, if you want to give £12000 for a 5 year old focus.


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## Heavyassweights (Jan 18, 2014)

Have the fbi dusted down the motor and tracked down the size 9s that were on your bonnet?


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## essexboy (Sep 7, 2008)

Heavyassweights said:


> Have the fbi dusted down the motor and tracked down the size 9s that were on your bonnet?


Ive got Crockett and Tubbs on it.


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## gummyp (Aug 16, 2011)

IGotTekkers said:


> Haha I'm a bit skint atm so I'd just have to fight him off with some loose change :lol:


Is that the money you are putting up for your bareknuckle boxing match when you move into your caravan and become a pikey?


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## husky (Jan 31, 2010)

IGotTekkers said:


> Jealousy mate. Seems most ukm members are sex less, drive 1 litre fiestas, live in 1 bedroom flats and earn minimum wage, if you claim to have more than that then shiit the bed you had better have proof lmao


green eyed monster mate, some folk talk, others do.


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## barnz (Mar 25, 2014)

So what have we learned today folks?

Barsnack took a classic dig at Essexboy using the Friends sketch of Joey.

All the poor people on the forum jumped on the bandwagon and things got personal.

Tekkers has loads of cash lying about from an online business but is NOT a drug dealer

EssexBoy has proven he owns said Porsche (Which costs the same as my 1.2 corsa when I bought it new)

Help for Heroes has benefitted to the tune of £50.

Oh yeah, someone I forgot the name of welched out on stumping up money for a decent charity.


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## Heavyassweights (Jan 18, 2014)

barnz said:


> So what have we learned today folks?
> 
> Barsnack took a classic dig at Essexboy using the Friends sketch of Joey.
> 
> ...


Also @barnz hasnt read the thread

No proof of car as of yet


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## essexboy (Sep 7, 2008)

barnz said:


> So what have we learned today folks?
> 
> Barsnack took a classic dig at Essexboy using the Friends sketch of Joey.
> 
> ...


Dont let it stop you.


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## Double J (Nov 1, 2009)

essexboy said:


> The man at Dagenham motors, must love you, if you want to give £12000 for a 5 year old focus.


Didn't I mention it was an RS?


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## barnz (Mar 25, 2014)

Heavyassweights said:


> Also @barnz hasnt read the thread
> 
> No proof of car as of yet


 @DiggyV has confirmed it. Try reading the thread...


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## Heavyassweights (Jan 18, 2014)

barnz said:


> @DiggyV has confirmed it. Try reading the thread...


Must be true then

Fcukin lol


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## saxondale (Nov 11, 2012)

Dirk McQuickly said:


> I own a helicopter


Real one?


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## saxondale (Nov 11, 2012)

Technically the thread is still noporsche.


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## Dirk McQuickly (Dec 29, 2010)

saxondale said:


> Real one?


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## saxondale (Nov 11, 2012)

Dirk McQuickly said:


>


You've crashed it!


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## Dirk McQuickly (Dec 29, 2010)

saxondale said:


> You've crashed it!


I got it cheap. Needs a bit of work.


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## saxondale (Nov 11, 2012)

Dirk McQuickly said:


> I got it cheap. Needs a bit of work.


And then some football hooligan ..............


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## Heavyassweights (Jan 18, 2014)

saxondale said:


> Technically the thread is still noporsche.


Agree


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## barsnack (Mar 12, 2011)

IGotTekkers said:


> No mate iv been flat out actually just about finishing up my emails and counting up all the money's iv made tonight


that online drug dealing must be paying out fella....good man


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## barsnack (Mar 12, 2011)

husky said:


> green eyed monster mate, some folk talk, others do.


cringe


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## barsnack (Mar 12, 2011)

IGotTekkers said:


> Haha I'm a bit skint atm so I'd just have to fight him off with some loose change :lol:


you can have all the money in the world, but morally your a bit of a ****


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## husky (Jan 31, 2010)

barsnack said:


> cringe


no mate whats cringworthy is the constant wee digs at the same people.


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## barsnack (Mar 12, 2011)

husky said:


> no mate whats cringworthy is the constant wee digs at the same people.


I doubt ive hurt their feelings


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## BettySwallocks (Aug 1, 2012)

barsnack said:


> I doubt ive hurt their feelings


but does he have a porsche?


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## barsnack (Mar 12, 2011)

BettySwallocks said:


> but does he have a porsche?


he might do, but he's funny when he gets wound up bout it


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## Lotte (Feb 10, 2014)

IGotTekkers said:


> Jealousy mate. Seems most ukm members are sex less, drive 1 litre fiestas, live in 1 bedroom flats and earn minimum wage, if you claim to have more than that then shiit the bed you had better have proof lmao


How dare you! My 1997 fiesta is a 1.2ltr!!!

:tongue:


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## IGotTekkers (Jun 6, 2012)

barsnack said:


> you can have all the money in the world, but morally your a bit of a ****


Morally I'M a ****? Lol that's ****ing rich. Why are you even on ukm? You don't contribute whatsoever, you don't even lift ffs. You're just a bitter old man that missed out on life and your way of dealing with it is to constantly put down other people. How old are you barsnack?

If i thought you'd be smart enough to listen, I'd tell you to have a little look inside yourself and see where you fit in the world and the type of energy you spread.


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## Bataz (Jan 21, 2014)

Well that filled a gap between breakfast and brunch. Cheers boys.


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## Mal20729 (Mar 1, 2014)

IGotTekkers said:


> Morally I'M a ****? Lol that's ****ing rich. Why are you even on ukm? You don't contribute whatsoever, you don't even lift ffs. You're just a bitter old man that missed out on life and your way of dealing with it is to constantly put down other people. How old are you barsnack?
> 
> If i thought you'd be smart enough to listen, I'd tell you to have a little look inside yourself and see where you fit in the world and the type of energy you spread.
> 
> Failing that just grab a razor and put yourself out of your misery.


Handbags out are they boys?


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## Ashcrapper (Jul 3, 2008)

so, what did I miss?


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## essexboy (Sep 7, 2008)

Ashcrapper said:


> so, what did I miss?


Apparently I made a boastful thread about owning an imaginary car, that was trampled by some halfwit during the night.Its was obviously my fault, and many came to mock and scorn my vivid imagination, at daring to own a car they dont.I dontated some money charity, which apparently was a thinly veiled attempt to detract attention away from the car, that I dont own.


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## sneeky_dave (Apr 2, 2013)

essexboy said:


> Apparently I made a boastful thread about owning an imaginary car, that was trampled by some halfwit during the night.Its was obviously my fault, and many came to mock and scorn my vivid imagination, at daring to own a car they dont.I dontated some money charity, which apparently was a thinly veiled attempt to detract attention away from the car, that I dont own.


Top post is that mate.


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## Heavyassweights (Jan 18, 2014)

Ashcrapper said:


> so, what did I miss?


 @essexboy runs over cars and takes pics

We have all done it


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## SwAn1 (Jun 4, 2012)

Tekkers and Barsnack Charity boxing match all proceeds to help the heroes. Barnack must be drunk and Tekkers must be wearing his red braces. We can have it streamed in this thread


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## IGotTekkers (Jun 6, 2012)

SwAn1 said:


> Tekkers and Barsnack Charity boxing match all proceeds to help the heroes. Barnack must be drunk and Tekkers must be wearing his red braces. We can have it streamed in this thread


Can it be bareback I mean bare knuckle?


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## SwAn1 (Jun 4, 2012)

IGotTekkers said:


> Can it be bareback I mean bare knuckle?


Yep but strictly only one caravan allowed at the fight, winner gets bragging rights plus a drive in essex boys porche


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## Wavelength (Aug 12, 2012)

Can you wear just braces on their own? Surely they need to clip onto something?


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## SwAn1 (Jun 4, 2012)

Wavelength said:


> Can you wear just braces on their own? Surely they need to clip onto something?


Where did I say they were on their own, pervo?


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## barsnack (Mar 12, 2011)

IGotTekkers said:


> Morally I'M a ****? Lol that's ****ing rich. *Why are you even on ukm*? *You don't contribute whatsoever*, *you don't even lift ffs.* *You're just a bitter old man that missed out on life and your way of dealing with it is to constantly put down other people*. How old are you barsnack?
> 
> If i thought you'd be smart enough to listen, I'd tell you to have a little look inside yourself and *see where you fit in the world and the type of energy you spread*.
> 
> Failing that just grab a razor and put yourself out of your misery.


ill answer your questions ive highlighted

1) For training tips, diet help, have good craic with some of the members

2) Ive helped out some people with general stuff, whether it be obvious advice or support etc...vast majority of members don't actually contribute information, but there input in anything is what keeps any forum alive

3) Im 29, not bitter, your just funny to wind up, which I wont do anymore

4) I have the craic with ones on here, maybe one or two may take exception, but you cant please everyone. I just find the way you talk about girls, your sister getting smashed by your mate at your wedding etc as repulsive...ive no issue with people having swinging lifestyles etc, but you have you and your missus identity on here, which for a couple with kids, that's disgraceful... and you posted a photo of a girl you banged after your wedding, and said you weren't in an open relationship (good start),

5) I fit in perfectly in my life...got great family and friends, job and very happy...I don't have a bodybuilders physique, and not as big as yourself (going by your avi, very impressed), but its because I have no intentions of getting big, happy with the size I am...I play sports which added mass etc would have a negative effect, and I don't feel comfortable getting any bigger....*you should look at were you fit in*, going by your videos on youtube and activity on UKM, your a Goth, turned Skateboarder, turned Skinhead, wannabe vegetarian Traveller....you should find an identify YOUR comfortable with and be happy with that

6) Telling me to commit Suicide, is just another reason added to the reasons I find you repulsive...maybe telling people to cut themselves was acceptable when you where a Goth, but isn't nice.

P.S I will cease with my comments to yourself, and wish you well


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## Wavelength (Aug 12, 2012)

SwAn1 said:


> Where did I say they were on their own, pervo?


Yeah ok, it was a comical image while it lasted :laugh:

Wrestling is of course serious business so I expect he'll be using them to keep up his vinyl trunks.


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## essexboy (Sep 7, 2008)

Heavyassweights said:


> @essexboy runs over cars and takes pics
> 
> We have all done it


Yup, and now Ive Had to spend all day yesterday repairing it.Luckily it doesnt exist.


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## husky (Jan 31, 2010)

essexboy said:


> Yup, and now Ive Had to spend all day yesterday repairing it.Luckily it doesnt exist.


They imaginary cars take some prep work though


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## IGotTekkers (Jun 6, 2012)

barsnack said:


> ill answer your questions ive highlighted
> 
> 1) For training tips, diet help, have good craic with some of the members
> 
> ...


Fair play.


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## gymspaz (May 23, 2014)

IGotTekkers said:


> Fair play.


Are you the dianabol man from YouTube ?


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## saxondale (Nov 11, 2012)

@Ashcrapper Except essexboy is a car dealer so does he actually own the car, or is it just stock? In which case its noporsche - noaudi all over again


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## IGotTekkers (Jun 6, 2012)

gymspaz said:


> Are you the dianabol man from YouTube ?


It is I


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## gymspaz (May 23, 2014)

IGotTekkers said:


> It is I


Love your work mate, I'm a massive fan. Good to see someone getting solid advice out there to newbies. Truth be told I've got a bit of a man crush, not so much since u shaved your hair but still there


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## Mal20729 (Mar 1, 2014)

IGotTekkers said:


> It is I


Your hair is sh1t


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## IGotTekkers (Jun 6, 2012)

gymspaz said:


> Love your work mate, I'm a massive fan. Good to see someone getting solid advice out there to newbies. Truth be told I've got a bit of a man crush, not so much since u shaved your hair but still there


Hahaha cheers dude. :beer:


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## IGotTekkers (Jun 6, 2012)

Mal20729 said:


> Your hair is sh1t


Your posts are sh1t


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## Mal20729 (Mar 1, 2014)

IGotTekkers said:


> Your posts are sh1t


Rather have sh1t posts than **** hair and look like a fat justin bieber


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## SwAn1 (Jun 4, 2012)

The thread that keeps giving


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## IGotTekkers (Jun 6, 2012)

Mal20729 said:


> Rather have sh1t posts than **** hair and look like a fat justin bieber


I'll say my goodbyes now then as I don't see you lasting long on here lol.


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## Mal20729 (Mar 1, 2014)

IGotTekkers said:


> I'll say my goodbyes now then as I don't see you lasting long on here lol.


Well we'll see kid


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## IGotTekkers (Jun 6, 2012)

SwAn1 said:


> The thread that keeps giving


Like Pakistani siblings keep giving deformed children. This place is full of bloody tards lately


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## gymspaz (May 23, 2014)

Mal20729 said:


> Well we'll see kid


not sure if you're serious but we love the dianabol man you idiot


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## SwAn1 (Jun 4, 2012)

IGotTekkers said:


> Like Pakistani siblings keep giving deformed children. This place is full of bloody tards lately


It keeps me entertained whilst I wait for the final to start


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## Mal20729 (Mar 1, 2014)

IGotTekkers said:


> Like Pakistani siblings keep giving deformed children. This place is full of bloody tards lately


Racist too. Well done.


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## IGotTekkers (Jun 6, 2012)

Mal20729 said:


> Racist too. Well done.


What? Shut up.


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## Mal20729 (Mar 1, 2014)

gymspaz said:


> not sure if you're serious but we love the dianabol man you idiot


Your opinion matters zero to me. When you've been here a liiiitle longer than 18 posts maybe. Even then I doubt


----------



## Wavelength (Aug 12, 2012)




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## Mal20729 (Mar 1, 2014)

IGotTekkers said:


> What? Shut up.


Touchy. Keep the racism down please.


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## gymspaz (May 23, 2014)

Mal20729 said:


> Your opinion matters zero to me. When you've been here a liiiitle longer than 18 posts maybe. Even then I doubt


haterz gone hate


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## IGotTekkers (Jun 6, 2012)

Mal20729 said:


> Touchy. Keep the racism down please.


Racism is where you are prejudice against another person based on the colour of their skin.

I could not give a **** what colour a person's skin is.

Keep stiring the pot KID


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## Mal20729 (Mar 1, 2014)

IGotTekkers said:


> Racism is where you are prejudice against another person based on the colour of their skin.
> 
> I could not give a **** what colour a person's skin is.
> 
> Keep stiring the pot KID


I'm valid I'm pointing out I don't know why you brought a nationality into the subject followed by the mention of a disability coupling them together. It's fine if it wasn't but I've pointed out it shouldn't be tolerated if it was so cool it kid. If it's not racial then why is Pakistan brought into it? Explain

And kid - please. I've got milk older than you.


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## Kimball (Feb 26, 2012)

IGotTekkers said:


> Racism is where you are prejudice against another person based on the colour of their skin.
> 
> I could not give a **** what colour a person's skin is.
> 
> Keep stiring the pot KID


Nope, not really., It's against their race, which is irrelevant of colour, just that most people tend to choose whether they are racist or not based on colour


----------



## IGotTekkers (Jun 6, 2012)

Mal20729 said:


> I'm valid I'm pointing out I don't know why you brought a nationality into the subject followed by the mention of a disability coupling them together. It's fine if it wasn't but I've pointed out it shouldn't be tolerated if it was so cool it kid. If it's not racial then why is Pakistan brought into it? Explain
> 
> And kid - please. I've got milk older than you.


If i couple well made cars and Germans does that also make me racist? Pakistan was bought into it because in Pakistan there have been many cases of inbreeding leading to deformed children. What the hell does that have to do with racism?


----------



## Captain lats (Mar 25, 2014)

Merkleman said:


> Too much hate ITT, it brings a tear to my eye.


agree! It went from a porsche to bullsh!t accusations.


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## IGotTekkers (Jun 6, 2012)

Kimball said:


> Nope, not really., It's against their race, which is irrelevant of colour, just that most people tend to choose whether they are racist or not based on colour


It's nothing against there race at all of got friends from Pakistan, there was no racial prejudice there at all, I'm a SHARP ffs (skinheads against racial prejudice) lol


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## IGotTekkers (Jun 6, 2012)

Anyway since when was Pakistan a race? It's a country.


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## Mal20729 (Mar 1, 2014)

IGotTekkers said:


> If i couple well made cars and Germans does that also make me racist? Pakistan was bought into it because in Pakistan there have been many cases of inbreeding leading to deformed children. What the hell does that have to do with racism?


Nope. Really? Do I have to explain this? Really?!

Ok well it's because in the Germany scenario you are complimenting a nation specifically on their car building abilities. This is not a very offensive likening is it? I'd struggle to find anyone remotely able to offend with this.

However, taking Pakistan and deformed inbred children isn't really a compliment now is it. Do you see what I mean? A LOT of people could easily be offended by this and you could be seen as charging this towards racism with the fact you are singling out a nation.

Simple really.

There is no stirring here. I'd edit your thread though before someone actually does become offended by it and reports it.


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## Mal20729 (Mar 1, 2014)

IGotTekkers said:


> Anyway since when was Pakistan a race? It's a country.


Racism doesn't have to be specific to a race or creed it can encompass geographical location or prejudice also Tekkers.


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## Captain lats (Mar 25, 2014)

IGotTekkers said:


> It's nothing against there race at all of got friends from Pakistan, there was no racial prejudice there at all, I'm a SHARP ffs (skinheads against racial prejudice) lol


i agree with this. I have friends that sometimes say funny jokes about blacks that i find funny. Nothing too serious thats meant to offend though.


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## Mingster (Mar 25, 2011)

Tread closed. The posting never reached great heights, but now it's just getting silly.


----------

