# Bringing back the Beast - Road to recovery journal



## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Thought I would give a journal on here a go to give myself a kick start back into training

Last few months of my life have been a living hell for personal reasons. I have also been unable to train and so looking like crap as well. Confidence is very low and I really need to do something about it. The amount of drink etc I have been putting away lately is nothing short of complete madness. Been trying to get help for everything but I can't even get an appointment with the doc these days. So it looks like I'm going to have to sort things out for myself!

Hadn't done a single bit of exercise in the 2 months apart from a light bit of chest work in hospital gym last week which left me in agony for a couple of days! Least it was a start though. Think seeing my physique change has been mentally destroying coupled will all the other issues I have had. Mainly women of course! As most BBers will know people telling you that you have lost weight is not a nice feeling and I'm getting it all the time

So here's my little journal thingy. Probably not a traditional one in a sense as I led a very different lifestyle to most on here. Obviously I want help with training etc but its also going to be a place to moan when things go crap. Not one for recording every lift I do every day but will record the key things on here.

Diet has been terrible for months now. Going to address the training first and then tighten up the diet shortly after. My blood pressure is through the roof which is not surprising given the stress I have been under, amount I have been drinking etc so need to get that down a bit cos mine has always been okay until recently

Might even be able to make it humorous when I can shift this current bout of depression. Back to proper gym tomorrow or Wednesday for some light back work and maybe some shoulders too. Not a traditional workout but just want to get all the muscles loosened up again.

Just running slightly above TRT test doses at the moment but that will probably change as soon as I have a few sessions under my belt and stayed injury free. Was getting into decent nick before injury. I Had dropped 2 stone in a month and looking so much better. Now I'm looking flat and flabby so things have to change.

Will have to think long and hard about training routine as the tendons obviously don't like heavy volume and need lots of rest. Considering just lifting weights 3 days a week and doing 1 or 2 days pure cardio.

Goals are firstly to get a few decent sessions under my belt and assess the arms (have tendon problems in forearms as well as a problem with right elbow joint which specialists have not been able to successfully diagnose). Then all being well I am going to run a quick bulker before a diet before xmas

One positive thing at the moment is that I have full time work which is good. It is however long hours so probably wont be able to train as many days as I want but still not going to use it as an excuse.

Feel free to pop in and say hello. Any help and support would be great!


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## Uriel (Oct 14, 2008)

ok bro - i dont know what you been going through - i know you been a pish & cocke head, i know you been on your own a while, didnt know you had health issues.

so baby steps,

physically I have came back from a big injury once, muscle memory is a fact and you will come back pretty fast.

i will be around to help, encourage and poke merciless fun at you when you start firing on all cylinders but for now - welcome back to the fold bro, lets get to grips with the iron again...........like an old friend


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

First 'decent' session back today

Chest, shoulders and triceps

Consisted of 3 sets of the following all 6-8 reps

Flat BB bench

Tricep rope pulls

Shoulder DB press

Cable crossover flyes

Tricep pull downs

Front DB raises

Had to move a load of furniture this evening as well so reckon I will be in agony tomorrow. Session was quite positive though. No real pain apart from slight discomfort in right elbow doing pull downs. Have lost a lot of strength but lifted a bit more than I expected which was a nice surprise.

No training tomorrow then will see what happens Friday. Just have to take things easy til I get back to normal.

Just having a beer now as the stress in my personal life just keeps on mounting!


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## Uriel (Oct 14, 2008)

Irish Beast said:


> Just having a beer now as the stress in my personal life just keeps on mounting!


im have a few cans too - back on the wagon tomorrow.............i had some good nes and i hope you are on the up too soon mate


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Cheers. I think if I get told to be positive once more I might kill someone!

Being positive does **** all. Stella on the other hand.......


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Done a back session last Friday which I forgot to add in. Was pretty sore after is but glad it was over with.

Back to the iron today. Had a brutal weekend on the booze and a few tough days at work so no chance to train.

Chest and biceps today. Pushed a bit harder today and everything felt good. Still not a heavy session by any means but I am feeling the pain now already so will be crippled in the morning I imagine!

4 x Flat Bench

4 x Incline machine Bench

4 x Cable crossovers

4 x reacher curls

4 x alternate DB curls

So not a great deal but its feeling good which is the man thing. Just want to get some mass back over the next month then diet down for xmas. Done what any insecure person would do and got straight back on the gear yesterday so running a little 4 weeker of dbol to get some mass back. Pharma stuff so should gain nicely of it. Cant afford to eat too much though as the gut is pretty big already. The sensible thing would have been to diet then bulk but thats not the way I roll!

Might attempt cardio in the morning, then psyche myself up for legs at some stage over the weekend!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

First cardio session in about 2 months today.

5km on the treadmill in a shade over 30 minutes. Felt great and could have went on longer if I didn't have work.

Was happy with that as I expected fitness to have nose dived given my less than ideal lifestyle of late.

Hoping to train tomorrow depending on a few variables out of my control. Booze free weekend is the plan but whether or not that materialises I don't know. I'm actually craving a beer as we speak. normally if I can get through the early evening phase then im okay. Tough times ahead!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Gym on a Saturday! First time in god knows how long!

Felt great not to be hungover and do a good session

4 x Lat Pull downs

4 x Bent over rows

4 x Hyper extensions

4 x machine rows

4 x preacher curl

3 x db curls

3 x front row

Will start adding weights lifted at some point soon, if anyone actually posts in here!

Heaviest session so far and it felt good. Getting a nice pump from dbol already! Next few weeks should be interesting if I can keep the booze down and keep training hard.

On a side note I filled a basket in M&S earlier (had some vouchers). Came to £73 ****ing quid. Will eat like a king this week though!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

I should add I normally do 6-8 reps on everything. I will start to do burn outs as well on last set once I am happy that my arms can take it


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## Mingster (Mar 25, 2011)

Nice session there mate. Looking forward to seeing you do well with this. Now get some of that grub cooked and stay off the grog. All the best to you:thumbup1:


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Thanks very much mate.

Not gonna be easy but I can only try! Finally seeing the light maybe!


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## Mingster (Mar 25, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> Thanks very much mate.
> 
> Not gonna be easy but I can only try! Finally seeing the light maybe!


No, mate, it isn't easy and you'll need all the support you can get. What I can say is that there is life after the ale and it can be done. But easy....no, not at all. Once again, wishing you all the best :thumbup1:


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Shoulders and triceps today

All roughly 6-8 reps

4 x Military Press

4 x Lateral side raise

4 x CGBP

4 x Pull downs

4 x Bench dips

Not big weights but felt good and decent pump afterwards.

More importantly today is now a week without a drink which I am really happy about. Was so focused in work instead of being depressed and hungover!

Starting to feel quite good. Still taking every day as it comes though. Im only ever one drink away from being back in the dumps at any time!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Just a half session on legs today. Not trained legs in months and live up 4 flights of stairs so dont want to be crippled tomorrow. Need to break them in gently!!

4 x Squats 8-10 reps up to a whopping 90 kilos!

4 x Calf raises 12-15 reps on 100 kilos

4 x Hamstring curls 6-8 reps up to 70 kilos

Not much of a session but the mental barrier of doing first leg session in ages is down at least


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Chest and biceps today

4 x Flat Bench 6-8 reps. Up to 110 kilos

4 x Incline Smith 80 kg to failure

4 x Cable crossovers to failure 25kg on each cable

4 x DB curls to failure with 17.5 and drop set on last

4 x Preacher curl 6-8 reps with drop set on last

Felt good although strength is still not great. Only been back in training properly for just over a week so not overly concerned.

Body is aching as ive done 4 days in a row now so a much needed rest day in store tomorrow. Feel like I have gained size already although that could be just water retention from the dbol. Still no booze and diet has been pretty good


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Quick back session today, time was not on my side!

4 x Lat pull downs 6-8 reps up to 85 kilors with drop set on last

4 x Machine rows 6-8 reps up to 80 kilos (machine limit - piece of ****) drop set on last

4 x Bent over rows 60 kilos 6-8 reps (to failure on last 2 sets)

4 x Hyper extensions, lost count of reps


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Shoulders and Triceps today

4 x Military press (Smith machine) 6-8 reps up to 60 kilos (not entirely sure what bar weights but its less than 20 definitely)

4 x DB shoulder press up to 20 kilos (delts were fvked) with drop set on last

4 x Front DB raises with 15kg DBs to failure every time

4 x Cable crossovers with 25kg on each arm to failure

4 x CGBP 6-8 reps up to 80 kilos

4 x Pulldowns 6-8 reps up to 40 kg (I think) with drop set on last

3 x Bench dips. About 5 reps a time, arms like jelly by then

Felt really good and it was nice not to have to rush it to get ready for work.

11 days without booze now!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Funny little incident at the gym today!

Made my protein shake and managed to drop it on the floor so it exploded everywhere. There was nothing to clean it up so I left it. Then came out of the pool and there had been a power cut in the changing rooms. Lights finally came on and there were loads of people swearing and pink foot prints everywhere!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Another sober Saturday night. What a boring crock of **** my life has become


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## Milky (Nov 30, 2008)

Irish Beast said:


> Another sober Saturday night. What a boring crock of **** my life has become


Mate regardless of all the training talk well done for this.

Your life has been mad for yrs and a rest from in will do your body and mind the world of good

WELL DONE MATE...


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## Beklet (May 13, 2005)

Despite me taking the p1ss, I will subscribe to this......seeing as mentally, I'm in a similar place. Without going into the 'woe is me' bollocks (and I can't be ar5ed to dig out my own journal), have basically ceased heavy training for the last year after a horrible injury, have been doing some stuff (Polenastics, for upper body strength, I sh1t you not), and the odd gym session, but I need to get back into the swing of things. I'm not fatter, but I feel flabby, and it's not nice.......I will poke you with a sharp stick if you...er hang on.......you know what I mean


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

2 weeks dry tomorrow. Doesnt seem like much but its quite a milestone for me!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Beklet said:


> Despite me taking the p1ss, I will subscribe to this......seeing as mentally, I'm in a similar place. Without going into the 'woe is me' bollocks (and I can't be ar5ed to dig out my own journal), have basically ceased heavy training for the last year after a horrible injury, have been doing some stuff (Polenastics, for upper body strength, I sh1t you not), and the odd gym session, but I need to get back into the swing of things. I'm not fatter, but I feel flabby, and it's not nice.......I will poke you with a sharp stick if you...er hang on.......you know what I mean


Thanks, need all the support I can get. The last few months (well years really) have been something else. Just glad to be alive to be honest. Wont bore you with the details but Im pretty sure I have been close to death a few times over the last year.

Not going to be easy this at all. Having to change my life radically but its very hard!


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## Milky (Nov 30, 2008)

Irish Beast said:


> 2 weeks dry tomorrow. Doesnt seem like much but its quite a milestone for me!


Keep it up mate, it IS big deal mate, well done.


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

ta. Just taking every day as it comes.

i am not giving up drinking but I need to be mentally strong so that when I have a drink I just abstain the next day instead of going straight to the pub again. Finally seen the light about 2 weeks ago. Im earning quite well these days but dont have a pot to **** in because of my lifestyle. Had enough of the lifestyle to be honest. Do feel better in myself apart from the boredom. Got so used to living with the ex that its weird (but generally good) living on my own now!


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> Another sober Saturday night. What a boring crock of **** my life has become


I know I keep saying it but you probably need to find things to do to avoid bordem hun



Milky said:


> Mate regardless of all the training talk well done for this.
> 
> Your life has been mad for yrs and a rest from in *will do your body and mind the world of good*
> 
> WELL DONE MATE...


Abolustely....will let your brain chemsitry get a bit more stable and normal 



Irish Beast said:


> 2 weeks dry tomorrow. Doesnt seem like much but its quite a milestone for me!


2 weeks dry today my sober buddy!  How did you find the weekend?


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Chest and biceps today

4 x Flat Bench 6-8 reps. Up to 110 kilos

4 x Incline Smith 80 kg to failure

4 x Cable crossovers to failure 25kg on each cable to failure with 2 drop sets

4 x DB curls to failure with 20kg and drop set on last

4 x Preacher curl 6-8 reps with drop set on last

Felt okay but triceps were still a bit tender from Saturday. Will up the weight a bit next week and see how I get on. Not going to go crazy or anything.

Have got a few comments in the last few days about looking bigger which is always nice to hear! People who don't know about gear etc and see me a few times a week so it must be noticeable!

2 weeks dry. Woohoo!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Katy said:


> I know I keep saying it but you probably need to find things to do to avoid bordem hun
> 
> Abolustely....will let your brain chemsitry get a bit more stable and normal
> 
> 2 weeks dry today my sober buddy!  How did you find the weekend?


Weekend was okay. Little bit boring but getting the playstation back in action helped a lot! Trying to remember what I used to do for fun before I became such a buffoon.

Was good to be fresh in work again on a Monday. The days are going really quickly as Im doing a lot as opposed to clock watching til I can go home and have hair of the dog!


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> Weekend was okay. Little bit boring but getting the playstation back in action helped a lot! Trying to remember what I used to do for fun before I became such a buffoon.
> 
> Was good to be fresh in work again on a Monday. The days are going really quickly as Im doing a lot as opposed to clock watching til I can go home and have hair of the dog!


That sounds brilliant. I love waking up refreshed too...and time definately goes by fast when you're not desperate for something to appease the hangover! I need to start getting into our PS3 too.


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

It's quite fun to be honest. Going to order a couple more games. They cost peanuts compared to booze and reccies.

Thanks for the support all. Really does help


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Legs today

5 x Squat 6-8 reps up to 110 kilos. Going to up the weight next week definitely.

4 x Leg press to failure. No idea what weight as the machine doesn't say!

4 x Calf raises 15-20 reps 135 kilos or something like that (machine maximum) with drop set on last

4 x Hamstring curls 8-10 reps up to 60 kilos

Not a lot of leg equipment at my gym sadly but its only my second legs session since returning and did push myself hard so expecting pain tomorrow. Will have to think of a few new exercises that I can do for next week


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## Mingster (Mar 25, 2011)

Looks a good all round workout to me mate:thumbup1:. Try adding a few lunges if you are looking for alternative exercises. They're a [email protected] to start with but once you get the hang of them they will give you a good quad, hamstring and glute workout in one exercise.


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## Milky (Nov 30, 2008)

Mate enjoy the walking tomorow....

How are your legs for size mate ? Do you consider them proportional to your body ?


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Mingster said:


> Looks a good all round workout to me mate:thumbup1:. Try adding a few lunges if you are looking for alternative exercises. They're a [email protected] to start with but once you get the hang of them they will give you a good quad, hamstring and glute workout in one exercise.


Lunges never agreed with me cos I have a glute problem that occasionally rears its ugly head and when it does its a nightmare. I am very meticulous with my stretching before leg workouts as I am conscious of the injury



Milky said:


> Mate enjoy the walking tomorow....
> 
> How are your legs for size mate ? Do you consider them proportional to your body ?


Gone down in a size a bit but they are definitely in proportion and incredibly solid. Legs are naturally quite good but I could do with getting a bit of size back on my quads as they have faded a bit recently. Hopefully they will grow fairly quickly!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Arms today!! Not done an arm only session in ages!

4 x CGBP 6-8 reps up to 80 kilos

4 x Tricep pull downs 6-8 reps up to 40 kilos with drop set on last

4 overhead tricep rope pulls 6-8 reps up to 65kilos with drop set on last

3 x Forearm curls with Bar only to failure

3 x Reverse forearm curls with bar only to failure

4 x DB curls starting at 20 kilos and working down. Failure on all

4 x Machine preacher to failure. Cant remember the weight.

Tendons give a slight discomfort but nothing to worry about. Will see how they are tomorrow. Very happy with the workout though


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Well done!!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Katy said:


> Well done!!


Ta bud 

I envisage pain tomorrow! Arms are a bit jelly like now! Ah well at least I had massive arms for about half an hour!


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## DiggyV (May 6, 2011)

just found this one buddy - subb'd.

good work keep it going.


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> Ta bud
> 
> I envisage pain tomorrow! Arms are a bit jelly like now! Ah well at least I had massive arms for about half an hour!


I did think you'd be suffering tomrrow! :laugh: But well worth it I bet. I quite like the pain as it's a reminder that I've worked hard


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## xpower (Jul 28, 2009)

Good to see your getting back on track mate


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Cheers all. Nice to have support.

Feels like I've finally turned a corner. Still very early days though!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Ive just had to abandon the ps3 as my arms were too weak to hold the controller in the air. That doesn't bode well!!


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> Ive just had to abandon the ps3 as my arms were too weak to hold the controller in the air. That doesn't bode well!!


Ha ha ha!! Bad luck...that rules out a few things then I guess :laugh:


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

DiggyV said:


> just found this one buddy - subb'd.
> 
> good work keep it going.


Thanks. Hopefully I can keep it interesting by going off the rails now and again! Cant have too much of this training lark in here!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Does anyone know how I can remove the 'crocked' from above my photo as I am no longer crocked! Can find where to change it.

Katy!! I would like it changed to Captain Awesome if possible?


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## Guest (Nov 16, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> Does anyone know how I can remove the 'crocked' from above my photo as I am no longer crocked! Can find where to change it.
> 
> Katy!! I would like it changed to Captain Awesome if possible?


Settings

Profile settings on the left I think....

Then put what you like in captain awesome 

Edit- its edit profile setting on the left


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Katy said:


> Ha ha ha!! Bad luck...that rules out a few things then I guess :laugh:


Most certainly. Won't be cleaning the oven today either! 

Arms aren't too bad today but feel very rubbery. Taking a day off the iron today to rest my weary body. Was going to do cardio but opted for the extra hour in bed!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Cheers ROB

I spent ages looking for that, don't know how I missed it. Anyway ta!


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## Guest (Nov 17, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> Cheers ROB
> 
> I spent ages looking for that, don't know how I missed it. Anyway ta!


No worries


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Much needed rest today. Cant stop bloody yawning.

Tried a new lab today called Rhino. Just some Sustanon. Anyone tried it?

Finished Modern Warfare 3 so really need to find something else to do this weekend now!


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## Uriel (Oct 14, 2008)

isnt it about time we had a few pics to hold you ransome to if you give this sh1t up on us?????


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Top was taken a while back but Im in similar condition. Bottom one was 2 weeks ago. Lot of work to do!


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## Guest (Nov 17, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> Top was taken a while back but Im in similar condition. Bottom one was 2 weeks ago. Lot of work to do!
> 
> View attachment 67982
> View attachment 67983


Got a good size to you buddy!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Thanks Rob. Think there is a decent amount of muscle hidden away.

I was 19 and a half stone in them. Reckon i have put on about half a stone since. Feel like I have anyway. Will post some more pics up before long


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## Uriel (Oct 14, 2008)

you are VERY hair free......Natural? lol

Not too shgoddy mate, half decent mass under there...good on you for posting them....too many bullsh1tters playing at it online. IMO thats a sign of a person with serious intentions


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## Guest (Nov 17, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> Thanks Rob. Think there is a decent amount of muscle hidden away.
> 
> I was 19 and a half stone in them. Reckon i have put on about half a stone since. Feel like I have anyway. Will post some more pics up before long


Still drink free....?!

Scales should be going the right way, you seem pretty determined mate.

What's you goal for the next 6 months.....


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Yeah still drink free. Have planned a night out next Friday so will crack then.

Intentions for next 6 months are to pile on loads of mass then diet down. Dieting wad going well a while back til I got injureds

Not going to diet til I am happy with size.


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Sadly I am not naturally hair free. It grows in terrible patches so I tend to shave it a lot!


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## Guest (Nov 17, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> Yeah still drink free. Have planned a night out next Friday so will crack then.
> 
> Intentions for next 6 months are to pile on loads of mass then diet down. Dieting wad going well a while back til I got injureds
> 
> Not going to diet til I am happy with size.


Lol, countdown till crack day 

You have a good size now! Cut and you'd look sh1t hot !!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

No chance Rob. Want to pack on far more first! Mentally Im in a good frame of mine so want to aim big. Keeping the booze down is half the battle for me!


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## Guest (Nov 17, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> No chance Rob. Want to pack on far more first! Mentally Im in a good frame of mine so want to aim big. Keeping the booze down is half the battle for me!


What's "aiding" you at the mo, did you say you have some new sus....

Fvck the drink bro, I've not touched a drop since 2005


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Dbol and test. Was on cyp but swapped to Sus today

Gaining well which is good. Pharma dbol is immense. Going to see the year out on test then might consider GH in new year for a prolonged period if I can keep the drinking in check


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## Guest (Nov 17, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> Dbol and test. Was on cyp but swapped to Sus today
> 
> Gaining well which is good. Pharma dbol is immense. Going to see the year out on test then might consider GH in new year for a prolonged period if I can keep the drinking in check


I'm on pharma Dbol at the mo, just over a week in at it's hit me nicely 

Starting my first ever jabs in the next few days !!

GH is expensive, keep crusing lol

I'm sure you'll do good on the drinking bro .


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Well if I can keep drinking etc down then I will have a load of spare cash! Basically I have partied away all my money for the last 8 years and have **** all to show for it now at almost 31!


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## Guest (Nov 17, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> Well if I can keep drinking etc down then I will have a load of spare cash! Basically I have partied away all my money for the last 8 years and have **** all to show for it now at almost 31!


Well at least your honest with your self !!

Bring on the mass


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> Well if I can keep drinking etc down then I will have a load of spare cash! Basically I have partied away all my money for the last 8 years and have **** all to show for it now at almost 31!


I think that the past 3 weeks have proven your ability to avoid the booze. Hopefully, if you do drink next Friday, you can get bet back to how you are now...make it more of a one off / ocassional thing as opposed to beginning or your old ways again?


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## DiggyV (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> Yeah still drink free. Have planned a night out next Friday so will crack then.
> 
> Intentions for next 6 months are to pile on loads of mass then diet down. Dieting wad going well a while back til I got injureds
> 
> Not going to diet til I am happy with size.


Its baby steps on the booze buddy, one day at a time. I dont drink at all now, in fact I can't remember when I last had a glass of anything, just dont seem to enjoy it. I always drive when we go out, so that makes it easy to say - I'm the driver so not for me thanks!

Also have a couple of American friends who have gone the AA route, and swear by it. HOwever you do it, stick with it, not just for the cash, but also it is full of calories, so will help with the diet as well.

good luck and keep us posted.


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Katy said:


> I think that the past 3 weeks have proven your ability to avoid the booze. Hopefully, if you do drink next Friday, you can get bet back to how you are now...make it more of a one off / ocassional thing as opposed to beginning or your old ways again?


Next weekend will be a massive test for me. I have sort of arranged a non drinking activity on the Saturday which should help. However when I wake up after a heavy session I normally crave drink immediately!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Back and traps today.

4 x Pull downs 6-8 reps up to 85 kilo with drop set on last

4 x Hyper extensions

4 x bent over rows 6-8 reps up to 70 kilos with drop set on last (pumps from hypers made these quite hard)

4 x Machine rows up 6-8 reps up to 80 kilos (I think)

4 x Front rows with 50 kilos to failure

Not a massive session but didn't have a great deal of energy today. Got a second wind near the end but time was running out by then

Feel a difference in size which is nice. Little bit bloated but nothing I can't handle


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> Next weekend will be a massive test for me. I have sort of arranged a non drinking activity on the Saturday which should help. *However when I wake up after a heavy session I normally crave drink immediately!*


Same here! That's pretty much why I'm staying away from heavy drinking...I'm scared it would be a downward spiral.

Good thinking with planning a non drinking activity! :thumbup1:


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Katy said:


> Same here! That's pretty much why I'm staying away from heavy drinking...I'm scared it would be a downward spiral.
> 
> Good thinking with planning a non drinking activity! :thumbup1:


If truth be told I didnt plan it as such. I sort of feel like I have to go. Saying that thought it might be fun. A friend of mine does a martial art (which I can never remember) to a very high level. Few of them are putting on an exhibition of sorts at the local sports academy. Will either be really cool or incredibly dull!


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> If truth be told I didnt plan it as such. I sort of feel like I have to go. Saying that thought it might be fun. A friend of mine does a martial art (which I can never remember) to a very high level. Few of them are putting on an exhibition of sorts at the local sports academy. Will either be really cool or incredibly dull!


Either way, it could be an experience  I reakon that if you can get through the first day after drinking you'll be on track.


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Katy said:


> Either way, it could be an experience  I reakon that if you can get through the first day after drinking you'll be on track.


You are right. Next Saturday will be a nightmare. I just know it. Can't say I am confident of staying dry after the Friday session. Normally I just drink day after day until it gets to the stage I am too ill to continue or work gets in the way!


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## Milky (Nov 30, 2008)

Irish Beast said:


> Well if I can keep drinking etc down then I will have a load of spare cash! Basically I have partied away all my money for the last 8 years and have **** all to show for it now at almost 31!


Mate l was 39 when l turned my life around, you have gotten 10 yrs on me, dont give up.


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Were you a heavy boozer milky?


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## Milky (Nov 30, 2008)

Irish Beast said:


> Were you a heavy boozer milky?


No mate, just sh*te with money, bought all sorts of sh*t l didnt need, basically what you said about having nothing to show at 31.

I realise your battling your demons but my point being once you take control and have a few quid in your bank you want to keep at it.


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

I honestly cant remember what it feels like not to be in a load of debts! Got a lot paid off though in the last few weeks which is good but its depressing working a long week and having hardly any cash come friday!


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## Beklet (May 13, 2005)

I must be getting old.....I do like a drink, but I actually can't be ar5ed getting p1ssed anymore, I just spend the next day feeling knackered and craving stodge.....that's not to say I don't sometimes go overboard, but it's not worth the hassle.... 

As for 31 - my life very nearly went tits up when I was 32....by 33/34 I was in loads of debt (still in plenty, but now it's manageable), but I got through it - it'll be a long while before I can afford the high life lol but I'm in a much better place than I was 3 years ago...it seems a neverending slog, then one day you realise you've got through the crap, it's a nice feeling


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

I think there is light at the end of the tunnel now bek!

On a side note I not have two girlies posting in my journal. Does that make me popular?


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> I think there is light at the end of the tunnel now bek!
> 
> On a side note I not have two girlies posting in my journal. Does that make me popular?


Ha ha...probably given how rare-a-breed we are on here! :laugh:

Beks, nice post.


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Shame so many girlies left before I put my topless photos on. Could have been tits and ass central in here. And I don't mean mine!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Shoulders and triceps today

4 x Overhead push press 6-8 reps up to 60 kilos (was very weak today!)

4 x Machine lateral side raise 15 kilos to failure

4 x CGBP 6-8 reps up tp 90 kilos

4 x Pull downs 6-8 reps up to 55kilos with drop set on last

3 x Front DB raises with 15kg to failure

3 x Bench dips

3 x Shoulder DB press with 25kg DBs to failure

Woke up at half 4 this morning and couldn't get back to sleep so was shattered going to gym and think lifts suffered as a result. At least I got there though and done a session. Would have been easy to skip it.

Didn't make the weigh in. Will try tomorrow


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Well done for going not only on a Saturday but also whilst sleep deprived...sounds like you're very motivated


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Katy said:


> Well done for going not only on a Saturday but also whilst sleep deprived...sounds like you're very motivated


If by motivated you mean annoying sober than yes you are absolutely right


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Weigh in today.

Bit disappointed that I don't appear to have gained anything of note since starting cycle nearly 3 weeks ago. I am also carrying water so might have actually lost weight! However I do feel like I have gained muscle so not all bad. I have been eating a lot but maybe I need to up the calories even more! Ah well could be worse.

Weighed in at 19st 5 lbs but was covinced it was going to say 20 as I was 19 about 4 weeks ago and have been eating loads, training hard and on cycle since then.

Food for thought


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## Big_Ant (Aug 3, 2011)

Just been reading through your thread bud , well done on staying dry you seem to have lots of motivation and putting lots of effort in just stick to it. do you feel better in your self? tbh 4 years ago i was drinking every night and getting off my head every weekend on mdma and other stuff , knocked it in the head 2 years ago lots of gym and eating well feel a thousands times better now.


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Big_Ant said:


> Just been reading through your thread bud , well done on staying dry you seem to have lots of motivation and putting lots of effort in just stick to it. do you feel better in your self? tbh 4 years ago i was drinking every night and getting off my head every weekend on mdma and other stuff , knocked it in the head 2 years ago lots of gym and eating well feel a thousands times better now.


Feel far better. Almost a new lease of life in fact. Still got a lot of **** to deal with but its easier with a clear head. I do miss having a drink but it feels amazing being fresh every day and training well. Going to be very hard though with xmas coming up etc. Taking every day as it comes!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Legs today

5 x Squat 6-8 reps up to a maximum of 130 for a few reps.

3 x Lunges with 15 kg on each arm. Man they were tough

4 x Calf Raises burn out every time with drop set on last

4 x Hamstring curls up to 60 kilos with drop set on last

4 x Leg press 6-8 no idea about weight cos machine doesn't say.

Pushed the legs quite hard today so am expecting pain tomorrow! Starting to stiffen a bit now!!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

On a non training related note I finally got my business account set up today so will have a bit more money. 17 working days is a completely **** take but at least its done now. Not a great start to a working relationship but hey ho.

Looking forward to having a beer on Friday! Feel like I have really earned it!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Lot of 'like' love tonight.

I would love to say that it fills the void left by alcohol but that would be a complete fu.cking lie


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## Milky (Nov 30, 2008)

Irish Beast said:


> Lot of 'like' love tonight.
> 
> I would love to say that it fills the void left by alcohol but that would be a complete fu.cking lie


Mate its just us showing our support..


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Milky said:


> Mate its just us showing our support..


Cheers, it does help.

3 weeks to the hour almost since I had my last drink. Another mini milestone!


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> Cheers, it does help.
> 
> 3 weeks to the hour almost since I had my last drink. Another mini milestone!


Whoop whoop! :bounce: Awesome, I'm really impressed! Glad you finally got you business account sorted too


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Katy said:


> Whoop whoop! :bounce: Awesome, I'm really impressed! Glad you finally got you business account sorted too


Thanks! Quite pleased with myself too. Friends are shocked that I have managed it.

On a traning note my ar.se is absolutely killing me today. Maybe I should have taken it easier on the lunges!!

Chest and Biceps today

4 x Flat Bench 6-8 reps up to few reps of 110 kilos (expected more, was doing a few 140s before injury)

4 x Incline 90,80,70,60 to failure

4 x Pec Dec 8-10 reps No idea what weight it was

4 x DB Curls 17.5kg to failure with drop set on last

4 x Machine preacher 40 kilos to failure with drop set on last.

Felt good and could definitely have done more but I trying to limit the stress on my upper body to a degree as I'm scared of getting injured and ruining the consistancy that I now have going.

Expected a bit more in the strength department from the dbol but not overly bothered about strength in the grand scheme of things. Just nice for the ego really. Body is taking a bit of shape now. Think I may be burning a bit of fat but its hard to tell when carrying so much! Could be just generally feeling firmer.


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> Thanks! Quite pleased with myself too. Friends are shocked that I have managed it.
> 
> Body is taking a bit of shape now. Think I may be burning a bit of fat but its hard to tell when carrying so much! Could be just generally feeling firmer.


Same here...was offered some wine next door last night and when I turned it down they were shocked and really impressed when I said it had been 3 weeks.

I'm sure that stopping the booze has made a big difference to your fat loss!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Katy said:


> Same here...was offered some wine next door last night and when I turned it down they were shocked and really impressed when I said it had been 3 weeks.
> 
> I'm sure that stopping the booze has made a big difference to your fat loss!


You'd think so wouldn't you!!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Katy said:


> Same here...was offered some wine next door last night and when I turned it down they were shocked and really impressed when I said it had been 3 weeks.
> 
> I'm sure that stopping the booze has made a big difference to your fat loss!


My Friday night drink could be in jeopardy! Friend may have double booked! Fu.ck!

Will be having a drink this weekend regardless but I wanted it to be a civilised one. This is now tricky.


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> My Friday night drink could be in jeopardy! Friend may have double booked! Fu.ck!
> 
> Will be having a drink this weekend regardless but I wanted it to be a civilised one. This is now tricky.


Oh. What do you mean by 'civilised' then? Can you still have a civilised drink with someone else?


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Katy said:


> Oh. What do you mean by 'civilised' then? Can you still have a civilised drink with someone else?


Civilised as in good conversation, regular pace of drinking etc.

No I cant have a civilised drink with most of my other friends, it will turn into a bender. Pure and simple!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Just a bit of cardio today. Done about 4 km on treadmill and hit emergency stop by accident. Just got off then cos I couldnt be bothered starting it up again!

Steve


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Fvck me I could do with a drink! Complete and utter cvnt of a day! Valium required in large quantities as I feel like Im going to pop a blood vessel otherwise!!

Some pics took after tea unpumped. Bit of size gained since last ones and feel a bit firmer so will continue as I am going for now


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## xpower (Jul 28, 2009)

Still got plenty of size on ya mate.

You'll be back in shape in no time


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## Milky (Nov 30, 2008)

Keep it up mate.

Your going great guns..


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Hopefully. Mind you I have made the executive decision to go on an almighty bender on Friday. May not surface for days!


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## Milky (Nov 30, 2008)

Irish Beast said:


> Hopefully. Mind you I have made the executive decision to go on an almighty bender on Friday. May not surface for days!


Can l ask why mate ?


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Milky said:


> Can l ask why mate ?


Not one thing in particular. Just 101 little things stressing me out. Mainly companies, banks etc. I am absolutely flat out in work as well so have spent the whole week on the phone trying to sort out company fvck ups whilst trying to do my job as well. Had a splitting headache most of the day. I get them when very stressed.


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## Milky (Nov 30, 2008)

Fair enough mate, just seems a shame to undo your good work but were all different.


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

It was inevitable! Not looking for sympathy but I really do seem to have extraordinarily bad luck all the time! My friends have been joking about it for years saying I am the unluckiest Irishman on the planet!


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

How did last night go? What did you end up doing in the end and how are you feeling this morning?


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Well I am off the wagon! Trained shoulders and triceps on Friday. Nothing to note to report.

Went out on Friday and just stuck to guinness. Probably about 15 in total so wasn't particularly drunk. Went home and done a few lines, nothing major. Then on Saturday I woke up feeling okay. Went for a pub lunch and probably drank about 8 pints then head for home. Was going to hit the office licence but didnt in the end as I want to try and really cut back on the amount I drink at home. Don't get the same pleasure.

Probably going to watch the match at home today to save money and liver. However there is a slightly temptation to go to pub.

So all thing considering I didn't do too badly. Not going to drink next weekend either but then after that I have various xmas parties etc so drinkign will be unvoidable.

Fairly pleased with myself on the whole although I spent a bit more than I was planning to!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Fair bit of booze consumed over the weekend but not huge by my standards. Stuck to pints and wouldnt say I was particularly drunk at any stage although I was fairly well oiled on Friday.

Managed to train this morning although was really pushed for time due to a multitude of cock ups on publick transport so only managed a bit of chest work before I had to go.

4 x Flat 6-8 reps up to about 4 reps of 120

4 x Incline bench 90kilo reverse pyramids to failure

4 x Cable crossovers 30 kilos on each with drop set on last.

Sure I done something else but I can't remember what! Time was such a factor I didn't get much done but better than nothing!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Legs today

5 x Squat starting at 100kg working up to a couple of reps of 150kg. More than I expected given Ive barely trained legs at all for ages

4 x Leg press machine maximum to failure

4 x hamstring curls 10-12 reps to failure with drop set on last, up to 70kilos

4 x Calf raises, 130 kilos for loads of reps to failure with drop set on lasy

3 x Lunges 15kg in each hand and just body weight for last set. Legs were like jelly by then.

Felt pretty good. Should be able to hit some big squat weights in a few months I hope.


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Shoulders and tris today

4 x Smith Military Press 70kg 6-8 reps to failure on last 2

4 x CGBP 80kg 6-8 reps to failure on last 2

4 x Front DB raises 17.5 kg 10-12 reps with drop set on last

4 x Tricep pull downs with rope. Only 35kg cos I got the sh1t machine that is stiff as hell. Failure every time

4 x side cable raises 30kg to failure each time with drop on last

4 x Bench dips to failure

Notable strength increases now which is nice. Only got about a week of dbol left though then I will be on test only. Will plan New Year cycles very soon!

Going to have a glass of wine tonight. Tomorrow is rest day and had a hard week at work so far!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Just had a horrendously painful injection. Don't know what was wrong.

Stuck needle in delt about a centimetre and had to draw out cos of the pain. Waited a minute then injected a bit to the side. Bit sore going in but afterwards my arm was horrendously sore for a good hour! Still not completely right. Scar tissue may have built up a bit but delts are usually my favourite jab!

Same gear as I have been using for ages now. Really don't know what the hell is going on!


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## Beklet (May 13, 2005)

Irish Beast said:


> Just had a horrendously painful injection. Don't know what was wrong.
> 
> Stuck needle in delt about a centimetre and had to draw out cos of the pain. Waited a minute then injected a bit to the side. Bit sore going in but afterwards my arm was horrendously sore for a good hour! Still not completely right. Scar tissue may have built up a bit but delts are usually my favourite jab!
> 
> Same gear as I have been using for ages now. Really don't know what the hell is going on!


Ouch......I hit something grim a couple of years back doing MT2 - had a huge bruise on my leg for a month


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Morning Mofos.

Just letting you know I haven't died! I have literally hald man flu/cold for almost 2 weeks now. Still have it but going to force out a session this morning. Its not getting better by resting so maybe a bit of weights and a lengthy spell in the sauna will sort me out. Going to be a very long week if it doesn't!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Beklet said:


> Ouch......I hit something grim a couple of years back doing MT2 - had a huge bruise on my leg for a month


Strange isn't it. Normally I don't moan about having a little pr**k in me, but that one just didn't want to go in


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## DiggyV (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> Strange isn't it. Normally I don't moan about having a little pr**k in me, but that one just didn't want to go in


 :lol:

Yes but your supposed to use a pin not a turkey baster. How much went in this morning?


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Was on the hot whiskey last night. Figured a couple might help get bug out of my system.

Went in this morning and there's only about an inch left in the bottle. Just a half bottle mind but still a fair bit when washed down with 3 cans of bitter!

P.S Expecting moaning update around lunch time today


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

DiggyV said:


> :lol:
> 
> Yes but your supposed to use a pin not a turkey baster. How much went in this morning?


2mls last night. Ultra smooth.


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Went to gym and done a little bit of chest. Feel absolutely dreadful now. Literally dying in work.

I'm someone handed me a gun i would probably take my own life now. Thought I was over the worst of it. Seriously wondering if this is actually a cold now or something more sinister!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Bit of back and biceps today. Nothing major as I woke up with a sore arm. Another random bloody injury! Will get back to posting workouts when I get back to working out properly!

Will do a couple of sessions this week then that will be it until the New Year, Got so many boozin sessions planned that it will take real dedication to get through them all!

I'm actually quite looking forward to the prospect of a diet in the New Year. I'm fatter than ever now and will surely be worse in 2 weeks time. I honestly dread to think!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Thought I would give this thread a bit of a bump as yet again I am coming back from injury and various other problems. Started back in the gym about 2 weeks ago.

Strength is abysmal and I have dropped a fair bit of muscle.

Sitting at just over 18 stone but feel very small and out of shape. Doing a mixture of cardio and moderate intensity weights until my body gets used to things again. Not going to worry about my bodyfat being too high at the moment. Concentrating on getting some muscle mass and confidence back before looking to cut.

Diet has been pretty clean and have been trying to keep my drinking to weekends with some success.

Will be using chemical enhancement to help me with my goals of course!


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Great to see you posting in your journal again!! 2 weeks back is a good start - I always find that starting back is the hardest part and you've done that.


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

You're not kidding! I have been in constant pain for about 2 weeks. Arms are like jelly after this mornings session so I envisage a lot of pain tomorrow!

Hand is still sore to add to my list of injuries but I shall soldier on regardless!


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> You're not kidding! I have been in constant pain for about 2 weeks. Arms are like jelly after this mornings session so I envisage a lot of pain tomorrow!
> 
> Hand is still sore to add to my list of injuries but I shall soldier on regardless!


I'm sure it'll be worth it in the end


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## DiggyV (May 6, 2011)

good to have you back mate! :thumb:


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Well thats my second legs session out of the way! Out of all my muscle groups I would say I have lost most strength in my legs. Session didn't consist of very much cos some prat was monopolising the leg press.

Just done 4 sets of squats, 4 sets of calf raises and 4 hamstring curls but went to failure on most of the sets this time. The weights were pathetic but they will come back in time. Finished off with a cycle and a swim. Not a big session but any means but I am so worried about getting injured that I have to take it fairly easy.

Tomorrow is supposed to be a rest day but I will see how I feel in the morning. My weight is really shooting up though and Im very bloated round the gut which is annoying me a bit. Even though its probably water it just makes me look a lot fatter than I actually am (I think). Might pick up some aquaban in next few days. Seems to work reasonably well for an OTC supplement.

Just want to be back in the swing of things properly. Getting there very slowly!


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Sounds good mate! You're pushing yourself but also being careful...best way to increasing your strength IMO

You doing much cardio at all?


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Bit of cardio in there but probably not enough. Been doing one 5km run a week and a few laps of the pool after every session. Want to do 2 total cardio sessions per week going forward and 3/4 weight sessions.

It always surprises me how I can lose so much strength but seem to retain cv ability quite well. Can run 5km fairly easily and being well over 18 stone and a very heavy drinker its not bad going really!


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> Bit of cardio in there but probably not enough. Been doing one 5km run a week and a few laps of the pool after every session. Want to do 2 total cardio sessions per week going forward and 3/4 weight sessions.
> 
> It always surprises me how I can lose so much strength but seem to retain cv ability quite well. Can run 5km fairly easily and being well over 18 stone and a very heavy drinker its not bad going really!


Just think how good you'd be without the booze!! Yeah my fitness actually goes up if I take a break and don't lift weights - I think it's because I have more energy. I need to improve my HIIT type fitness...I'm good with prolonged low intensity (good stamina) but I want to inclcude activities that require sudden surges of CV output.


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Back to it today. Was meant to train yesterday but the doms in my legs are triceps were so bad I physically couldn't! So two rest days but felt better for it today.

Managed a half decent back session with a bit of bis and traps thrown in. Again didn't pay much attention to the weights being lifted. All fairly light but enough to work to failure at present

4 x Lat pull down

4 x Bent over row

4 x Level row machine

4 x Hyper extensions

4 x Preacher curl machine

4 x Standing DB curls

4 x Front rows

Pretty much all 6-10 reps working to complete failure on the last set. Felt pretty good though and think a little bit of size is coming back on my arms which feels good! Will start posting up weights lifted once I am back in the swing of things properly


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Just a bit of cardio today.

4 miles on the treadmill at steady jogging pace. Followed by a few laps of the pool. Felt pretty good and relatively easy despite carrying a shed load of excess water. Cardio is just so bloody boring. Really need a new iPod cos the gym music is barely audible cos its so faint


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Back to the iron today after a brutal weeks drinking. Strength was **** weak and only the deca got me though alive. Serious trembles afterwards so a good session done against the odds!

Chest and Biceps. All 6-8reps to filure on last 2 sets

4 x Flat bench

4 x Inclinebench

4 x dB flyes

4 x Cable crossover

4 X Machine PRachers

4 x Straight BB curls

4 a DB curls

Glad to get it done and got a decent pump after it. need to stop ruining my hard work with big drinking sessions. Wish it were that easy!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Legs today. Had no energy and a sore back from sleeping on a sh11ty mattress so not a good start!

4 x Squat

4 x Hamstring curls

4 x Leg Press

4 x Calf Raises

4 x Lunges

20 mins on cross trainer using legs only.

Okay session but haven't been in a great frame of mind for doing anything these last few days. Let alone training!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Back to it today after a much needed rest day!

Shoulders and triceps

4 x Behind the neck Military

4 x Front DB raises

4 x Side Cable raises (drop set on last)

4 x Seated DB press

4 x CGBP

4 x Tricep pull downs (drop set on last)

4 x Tricep push downs (drop set on last)

4 x Cable pullovers

Felt great working out today and had loads of energy. Funny really cos my diet for the morning consisted of a whey shake, a pot noodle and banana and a Mars bar! Getting well back into things now although strength is still w4nk. I think the DNP cycles I was doing when injured have stripped a lot more muscle than I initially thought :-(

Hopefully a month from now I will be looking better and lifting better!

Cardio only tomorrow as expect to be rather stiff


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## fitrut (Nov 20, 2007)

progress pics? :whistling:


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## Beklet (May 13, 2005)

fitrut said:


> progress pics? :whistling:


What she said :devil2:


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Finally some beast love!

Will pop some pics up before long. Look awful these days so started pumping mt2 last night so that at least I can be a bronze fat god!! 

Keep on posting in here whenever your hearts desire!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

8 cans down. 6 to go. Most Ive ever done morning cardio on is 12 so this could be fun. Yee haa!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

12 down, 2 to go.

Cardio 2mo looking unlikely! Gonna grab some EPO soon I think


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)




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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Back to the iron today after a pretty hungover rest day yesterday!

Back and a little bit of biceps today. Looked something like below. All 6-8 reps ish

5 x Lat pull down with drop set on last

4 x bent over cable rows

4 x Machine rows

4 x Hyperextensions

4 x Upright rows

4 x Preacher curl machine

4 x DB curls

Felt good and wanted to do more but my arms had other ideas! Were like jelly. I tend to get through my workouts very quick with little rest so that could be why. Feeling good though and enjoying my training more than I have for a while!

Another session tomorrow I think as the weekend is looking like a boozy one!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Legs today.

Kept it very simple indeed.

5 x Squats (failure on 3,4,6)

5 x Leg Press 6-8 reps

5 x Hamstring curls 6-8 reps

5 x Calf Raises 12-20 reps

Didn't have much time so had to hammer through it. Legs like jelly after!


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

You did well to train honey given our convos. Is all well?


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Same as ever sadly. really surpassed myself this weekend on the drinking front!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Back in the gym today after being drunk for a week solid. Needless to say it was pretty awful but managed to do something resembling a workout! The deca helped me through, without it I would have put a duvet on the bench and had a good sleep! Really need to stop these benders as they are getting heavier and more expensive every time!

Anyway just chest and a bit of biceps today. All sets of 6-8 reps working to failure on last 2 sets

4 x Flat bench

4 x Incline

4 x Pec Dec

4 x DB curls

4 x Preacher curls

Not much of a session but a start. Have definitely been gaining a bit of mass despite constantly fu.cking up by going drinking. Strength is not coming along well at all. Friend sent me a tub of dbol try to so started them this morning. Should help with the strength issue and lighten my mood a bit.


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## Huntingground (Jan 10, 2010)

IB, are you keeping off the beak mate??


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Huntingground said:


> IB, are you keeping off the beak mate??


Nope - still hammering it. Not as bad as I used to be but bad enough. Im spending more on booze these days to be honest as every time I go to the pub its £100 minimum


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Bit of legs today. Not been feeling great since last night and as expected I was pretty useless in the gym.

4 x Squats

4 x Hamstring Curls

4 x Calf raises

That's the lot. Felt like dropping afterwards. Was going to do leg press but some punk seemed to have taken up residence on it.

Hopefully I will have more energy tomorrow after a day of clean living!


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> Bit of legs today. Not been feeling great since last night and as expected I was pretty useless in the gym.
> 
> 4 x Squats
> 
> ...


Are you living clean at the moment then?


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Back and bit of Bis today. Was really tired going to the gym this morning but a can of energy drink and a mars bar worked wonders. Managed a decent session and felt much better than yesterday

Started with 3 close grip pull ups in which my dodgy hand nearly give way! Didn't feel good at all so won't be doing them for a while!

6-8ish reps of below

5 x Lat pull down

5 x bent over cable rows

5 x Machine Lever row with drop set on last

4 x Hyperextension (started dbol yesterday and the back pumps were horrendous)

4 x machine preacher curls with drop set on last 2

4 x Db curls

Much happier with today. Rest day tomorrow which is handy cos there's a good chance I will be going to the pub this afternoon!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

got alcohol counselling booked for Friday, puking blood is scary


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> got alcohol counselling booked for Friday, puking blood is scary


Ah, nice one Beastie. That's taken courage. I'm so glad that you've done that. What organisation are you getting support through?


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Addaction they are called


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> Addaction they are called


Ah, same as me


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

im gonna drink myself silly til then


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> im gonna drink myself silly til then


Your choice hun. Wish I could do the same to be honest! Just make sure you're well enough to attend counselling  Make sure you eat though. It's really important that when drinking too much you eat. It's difficult I know, I struggle with it.


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

the place is within spitting distance of were I used to buy beak, lollercoaster


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> the place is within spitting distance of were I used to buy beak, lollercoaster


Ha, well maybe stick to the counselling and not the coke! :laugh:


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

call me K


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> call me K


I can't at the mo hun, I have a horrible project that I'm working on. It has to be done by the end of the day.


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

ok, get crackin on it


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> ok, get crackin on it


I've almost finished now...yay! It's been hanging over my head for weeks and I might have actually finished  You necking the booze today then?


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

just been to thye off licence. 4 flights of stairs counts as a leg day!


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> just been to thye off licence. 4 flights of stairs counts as a leg day!


Ha ha, well that's better than me. I'm barely moving at the moment. I've lost a lot of muscle in just 3 weeks.


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Im so tonk that a few kilos of muscle wont make a difference

yee haa!!!!!!!!!!!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Im gonna smash 50 cans today


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> Im gonna smash 50 cans today


I don't know how you do it. That would kill me. My tolerance is clearly far lower than yours. Perhaps don't make that a goal though! If you do intend to cut down and even quit then the more you have now, the harder it will be to detox. Remember your heart as well!!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

if im gonna do the counseillng thing then im going out with a bang!

28 down judging by the cans on the floor"! 22 more to go


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> if im gonna do the counseillng thing then im going out with a bang!
> 
> 28 down judging by the cans on the floor"! 22 more to go


No drunken phone calls then please :laugh: With the amount you're on you wouldn't remember a thing! I take it you have no plans tonight then other than get battered?

I've been forced to dramatically cut my units but I think that I will feel much better for it tomorrow


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

too much booze


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

I went to a counselling service today and I was deemed the highest risk possible and she could not believe the amount I drank!!

She said if I stopped drinking sudden I might die!!

So I have been in the pub for 8 hours drinking more than most people could handle. Hasnt even touched the sides. Madness but im on the right path now


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## Fatboy80 (Feb 27, 2008)

Hope so mate, good to see you're taking the right steps.



Irish Beast said:


> I went to a counselling service today and I was deemed the highest risk possible and she could not believe the amount I drank!!
> 
> She said if I stopped drinking sudden I might die!!
> 
> So I have been in the pub for 8 hours drinking more than most people could handle. Hasnt even touched the sides. Madness but im on the right path now


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> I went to a counselling service today and I was deemed the highest risk possible and she could not believe the amount I drank!!
> 
> She said if I stopped drinking sudden I might die!!
> 
> So I have been in the pub for 8 hours drinking more than most people could handle. Hasnt even touched the sides. Madness but im on the right path now


I'm glad you went hun. That takes some balls IMO. It is quite unbelievable what you can put away. Are they going to help you taper off?


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Well she is gonna to refer me urgently to the specialists and ring me on Monday as Im in thew highest risk bracket. She said she had never known someone to drink so much. I turned up sweating and trembling and she told me to go and drink immediately which was very open minded of her and wait til I can get help. Went and drank a **** load and am on it again today cos when I explained my symptoms she said I could drop dead if I stopped. Got some valium today which are helping as I was in such a state yesterday. Its going to be a hard process but my counsellor was lovely. I completely opened up to her and she was really cool about it. She was a drugs specialist though but sais she wants me to go to alcohol referral next week but still come and see her which was really kind

Got a job interview on Monday which is going to determine the rest of my life as I will be evicted if I dont get it and lose everything. No pressure!!


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

That's fantastic hun. Sounds like she's really good. Please don't see the severity of your drinking as a free pass to go drink whatever you like though. Perhaps just drink what you need to stave off any symptoms? Otherwise you could end up increasing your intake even more which will make a detox even harder.

May I ask, what will do in work if you need to keep drinking throughout the day?


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

I wont drink in work ever. Im a bit funny about that given that its public money paying for me. Would be like stealing.

She did ask if I ever brought booze into work and we had a laugh as to how I could bring 40 cans in un noticed!! Was good to laugh about things.

First impressions were not good as I sat in the reception and the receptionist made my friend wait outside. Then this guy asked me if I had come straight from court???!!!??? He then kept asking me how long I had been mixing tarmac cos I am well built and irish! He was trying to be friendly but not what I needed in that frame of mind.

Im still drinking too much but got valium today which helps massively. Going to have a barbecue today and drink very slowly. Only drinking a beer every half hour. The tomorrow I am not going to drink at all but the valium will stop me getting panic attacks. So much hangs on Monday that you would not believe. Im really afr behind on my rent and have massive debts so need to get this job. Need a routine as well and to start interacting with people on a working level again


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Was the guy in reception another person seeking support? Very odd questions and very insulting! So I presume it wasn't a member of staff?

So you can actually not drink for a day or two? Valium should help. That's similar to what they prescribe when detoxing. I wish I'd have been able to have that during my detox!

BBQ sounds lovely and sounds good that you're preparing for the interview. Good luck with it hun.


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Cheers.

Going to stay dry today I think . Have 4 cans which a might have before bed later but not drinking today. Was getting chest pain last night which is not good and my heart is constantly racing which is not nice. Anyway hopefully my luck will change and I will get the job tomorrow as it would change everything!


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

How'd the interview go hun?


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Got a new job today!  Had the interview yesterday. Only 3 months initially but contracts more than likely last longer so a really great bit of news for me.

Been getting a dull chest pain though for a couple of days which is a bit worrying! Wanted to go to the gym today but figure I best not. Could be just a pulled muscle or anything.

Counselling woman never called back but hopefully she will soon. Working will help with my drinking enormously but I still have some underlying issues which probably need addressing.

All things considered I'm very happy!


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> Got a new job today!  Had the interview yesterday. Only 3 months initially but contracts more than likely last longer so a really great bit of news for me.
> 
> Been getting a dull chest pain though for a couple of days which is a bit worrying! Wanted to go to the gym today but figure I best not. Could be just a pulled muscle or anything.
> 
> ...


Nice one Beastie! That's awesome news. That's surely got to alleviate some stress. Do you feel that you might need to have yourself checked over with regards to chest pain? How's your heart rate at the moment?


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Yeah its a massive relief. Of course then I walked down to the post room to find a £280 gas bill and £180 from vodafone! Not going to let it spoil my day!

Chest feels a bit better after some aspirin. Heart rate is about normal for me so not overly concerned.

Off for a few celebratory drinks shortly. I know I shouldn't but what the hell!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Done shoulders and trics yesterday and fu.ck me i'm in agony! Thought I would be okay to resume where I left off but clearly not!

Usual sessions consisting of 6-8 reps

5 x Military press on smith

4 x Front DB raise

4 x Side DB raise

4 x CGBP

4 x Tricep pull downs (my abs are killing from these today)

4 x machine dips

Goos to get back to it but I'm really in a world of pain today! Might attempt to do legs later if a delivery Im waiting on comes in decent time. After about 3pm I try to avoid my gym as its packed full of 9 stone fu.ckwits throwingh weights around and screaming like they are being gangraped. Really annoys me.

I have lost my ipod again which is ****ing me off beyond belief. Went missing for a month until I found it last week now its vanished again! Cleaned the flat so I reckon its probably in the back of a bin lorry now!


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Nice one beastie...good to see you back into training. How's the drinking going? What you on at the moment?


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Had one beer after the cinema yesterday which was all I had that day which is really positive. Not feeling too bad at all. Still sweating loads though but have ordered some sage tablets which apparently work wonders for it. Don't want to be all sweaty in the new job. Would be so conscious of it. Planning a fairly modest weekend. Might have a few beers with my best mate on Saturday night as I've not seen him since I found out about the job so he's keen to have a drink with me. Planning on going to the gym but Im pretty shattered after cleaning the flat today. With aching delts and abs it felt like I was pushing a steamroller round the carpets instead of a hoover  At least its done now. I find it a lot easier to relax when the place is clean. Had a friend over for a few days and she tends to leave crap lying around everywhere and always dispersed, never in one place!!

Got much planned for the weekend yourself?


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

I prefer things clean and tidy too. Cleaned my car yesterday for that reason. The sweating will stop in time 

Need to calculate costs for the lignerie company this weekend ready to present to an invester and the bank. Other than that I'm having a roast with Lorian's parents on Saturday and then just chilling


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Well I had a savage weekend! Didn't drink loads by my standards but shovelled down an absolute ****load of coke. More than I have done in ages. Found out I will be getting a little cash injection very soon so went a bit mad and blew a fortune. Very tired today but not feeling too bad. Only got to bed at 4.30am and had to be up for a delivery at 9.

Tempted by the gym this afternoon as I start work tomorrow so probably won't fancy it in the morning but its one or the other!


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> Well I had a savage weekend! Didn't drink loads by my standards but shovelled down an absolute ****load of coke. More than I have done in ages. Found out I will be getting a little cash injection very soon so went a bit mad and blew a fortune. Very tired today but not feeling too bad. Only got to bed at 4.30am and had to be up for a delivery at 9.
> 
> Tempted by the gym this afternoon as I start work tomorrow so probably won't fancy it in the morning but its one or the other!


Do you not need to recover after all the sh!t you've consumed? Get you ready for a decent sleep and feeling on top for tomorrow?


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

I don't feel too bad other than being tired. Just eating like a horse now to make up for the last few days.

Left a message with Addaction to see what on earth they are doing. Its been 9 days now and not a word from them. Not what I need right now


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> I don't feel too bad other than being tired. Just eating like a horse now to make up for the last few days.
> 
> Left a message with Addaction to see what on earth they are doing. Its been 9 days now and not a word from them. Not what I need right now


Yep, I'm in a similar position. I've left messages for my key worker over the past 10 days and I've heard nothing! I will say something when he finally calls back!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Bit annoying really as the weekend could have maybe been avoided if I had been contacted last week. Not blaming her obviously but a call would have certainly helped! I really hope this doesn't turn out to be a waste of time.

Hopefully the routine of work will help. I just hope my brain still functions! Think I am going to take it easy today as Im just too tired to train. Only starting at 10 tomorrow so can train go home then head to work. Quite looking forward to getting back to the morning training. The gym is quieter and not full of complete fvckwits throwing weights around


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> Bit annoying really as the weekend could have maybe been avoided if I had been contacted last week. Not blaming her obviously but a call would have certainly helped! I really hope this doesn't turn out to be a waste of time.
> 
> Hopefully the routine of work will help. I just hope my brain still functions! Think I am going to take it easy today as Im just too tired to train. Only starting at 10 tomorrow so can train go home then head to work. Quite looking forward to getting back to the morning training. The gym is quieter and not full of complete fvckwits throwing weights around


Yeah. 2 days before my last relapse my key worker cancelled our appointment (half an hour after it was supposed to happen). I do wonder if maybe being able to talk through what was whirling through my mind might have made all the difference.

I personally think a rest is best for your body, but that's just my opinion. The routine of work makes a hell of a lot of difference to me so hopefully you'll find the same


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Decided Im going to just rest today and do a session in the morning. Done quite a lot of coke so putting pressure on my heart today might not be a good idea.

Looking to make a fresh start tomorrow and could really do with Addaction getting in touch because I know I won't be able to do it alone. I have tried and failed too many times. I have accepted now that my willpower alone is not enough


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> Decided Im going to just rest today and do a session in the morning. Done quite a lot of coke so putting pressure on my heart today might not be a good idea.
> 
> Looking to make a fresh start tomorrow and could really do with Addaction getting in touch because I know I won't be able to do it alone. I have tried and failed too many times. I have accepted now that my willpower alone is not enough


Rest is a good idea IMO.

Keep chasing them up hun. I do.


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

God what a tiring day!

Got up early to get to the gym before work. Buses were a nightmare so I ended up having to hammer chest and biceps in about half an hour. Was pretty hard going and couldn't lift much as I was only taking about 30 seconds break between sets.

Started the new job today and the early signs are good. Doesn't look like there will be much sitting around which is good as sometimes contracts are painful at the beginning. Seem like a nice enough bunch of people. So far so good. Nice to be busy but only got in at 7 and by the time I had ate and done some washing it was 8pm which doesnt leave much of an evening. Maybe a good thing though to keep me off the drink!

Annoying lack of fine females in the office but not surprising considering I work in IT. LOL

Still no contact from Addaction after leaving a message yesterday. Very poor show indeed


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Nice one Beastie. Glad the day went well. I think that little time for evening means little time to get bored and from what you've said before, you often drink when bored so this might all be a good thing.

Get a good nights sleep tonight Mr!

Yeah I called my key worker again yesterday and still nothing. I appreciate that it's a free service but if offering a service to people who need and rely on their support they should take that responsibility seriously. I'm going to call the orgnaisation today to ask if my ke worker is even at work or on holiday and perhaps ask for someone else.


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Another decent day at the office but I am really struggling with tiredness in the afternoon. Tried a practically zero carb lunch today and made no difference. Constantly having to walk outside to stop myself falling asleep. Only thing getting me through is energy drinks which are fine now and again but not repeatedly through the day. My part of the office is stuffy as hell and someone kindly pointed out how to change the temperature today so Im hoping that will help.

Shoulders and triceps this morning. Nothing to write home about. Strength is creeping up but painfully slowly. Seems to be getting a bit stronger all over but my chest doesn't seem to be which is very unusual for me as its usually the first place my strength returns.

No training tomorrow so looking forward to sleeping in a bit later. Hopefully that will help with the afternoon tiredness. Trying to get lots of meetings booked in as when I'm focused I don't tend to get sluggish


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> Another decent day at the office but I am really struggling with tiredness in the afternoon. Tried a practically zero carb lunch today and made no difference. Constantly having to walk outside to stop myself falling asleep. Only thing getting me through is energy drinks which are fine now and again but not repeatedly through the day. My part of the office is stuffy as hell and someone kindly pointed out how to change the temperature today so Im hoping that will help.
> 
> Shoulders and triceps this morning. Nothing to write home about. Strength is creeping up but painfully slowly. Seems to be getting a bit stronger all over but my chest doesn't seem to be which is very unusual for me as its usually the first place my strength returns.
> 
> No training tomorrow so looking forward to sleeping in a bit later. Hopefully that will help with the afternoon tiredness. Trying to get lots of meetings booked in as when I'm focused I don't tend to get sluggish


How did you sleep in the end? Are you feeling more alert today? What's happening with your booze and coke? Obviously booze signifantly affects the quality fo your sleep so if you don't drink you should get a really good nights sleep. Same goes with coke of course.


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Been sleeping really well thanks. Better than I have done for ages. Not drank since last weekend which is good for me. Been so tired in the evening that it wouldn't be worth my while. So no coke either. Tempted by some cans tonight but again am very tired so not sure if I will or not. Will inevitably drink at some point over the weekend but given that i've been dry all week I won't feel bad about it. Nice to get my first working week out of the way. Will be even better when I start getting paid.

Was really tired this afternoon again. Seems to be the days I train when I suffer in the afternoons. Make sense as I got 1.5-2 hours less sleep the night before.

Done back today and felt pretty strong but a little bit exhausted generally. Feeling quite good about myself at the moment. Just hope I can keep it real over the weekend


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

All sounds really positive hun. Glad you're sleeping well. Is there any way that you can train after work instead so you have more energy at work? It sounds like work is having a positive affect on your drinking in that you're too busy and then too tired to drink!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Not really unfortunately. The beauty of the gym at 7am is that its pretty empty so I can do my session in about 50 minutes. Its packed in the evenings so it would take far more than that. I wouldn't get in til after 8pm if I was to go after work which I couldn't handle. Would rather just get up early.

Just been for a takeaway and bought 8 cans. Not looking to get drunk (as if 8 cans would do that!). I just enjoy the taste of beer. The addaction woman was surprised that I drank so much regular beer as most move on to nasty stuff like special brew and spirits. Doesn't do the belly any good mind you.

meeting a friend in town at lunchtime tomorrow so going to hit the gym before that. Should be able to have a nice long sleep tonight though which will be nice


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Not a great deal to report today.

Managed to restrict myself to 8 cans last night and do a decent leg session today. Let strength is getting better which is good. Having a drink again tonight but won't go overboard. Got some unexpected money today so treated myself to a little blackberry tablet which is amusing me.

But bored though as I have not really seen anyone this weekend. Will have to get out and about tomorrow for some interaction!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Made the gym this morning as well! Havent done a Saturday and Sunday in about ten years!

Drank again last night but kept it reasonable. 4 cans and a bottle of wine which might seem a lot to most people but is very little to me. Off to the pub this afternoon to watch the football as I don't have sky at the moment. Just going to go for kick off and leave when its done. 8 pints max I would say. Want to be fresh in work tomorrow and keep myself focused. Being hungover in a project office is never a good thing as I have a tendency to forget conversations when I am hungover!

Chest and biceps today

5 x Flat Bench

5 x Incline

4 x Pec Dec

3 x alternate DB curls

3 x Preacher curls

Not a massive session in terms of volume but I went for heavier lifting than usual today to mix it up a little bit. Really can't be bothered with bicep training at the moment, find it really terdious. Strength is creeping up now which I imagine is down to my lifestyle being a bit better of late. No skipping meals due to drugs etc. Hopeffully I can keep it going for another bit. Plan on bulking for maybe another week, possibly two then starting to diet down.


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> Not really unfortunately. The beauty of the gym at 7am is that its pretty empty so I can do my session in about 50 minutes. Its packed in the evenings so it would take far more than that. I wouldn't get in til after 8pm if I was to go after work which I couldn't handle. Would rather just get up early.
> 
> Just been for a takeaway and bought 8 cans. Not looking to get drunk (as if 8 cans would do that!). I just enjoy the taste of beer. T*he addaction woman was surprised that I drank so much regular beer as most move on to nasty stuff like special brew and spirits*. Doesn't do the belly any good mind you.
> 
> meeting a friend in town at lunchtime tomorrow so going to hit the gym before that. Should be able to have a nice long sleep tonight though which will be nice


Yeah, my drink was gin (and white wine)...nasty stuff!



Irish Beast said:


> Not a great deal to report today.
> 
> Managed to restrict myself to 8 cans last night and do a decent leg session today. Let strength is getting better which is good. Having a drink again tonight but won't go overboard. Got some unexpected money today so treated myself to a little blackberry tablet which is amusing me.
> 
> ...


Bordem was an issue for me this weekend. I didn't plan anything and ended up bored out of mind..and then craving. I'm making sure I plan things now.


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Well I ended up putting away a fair bit yesterday but not loads by my standards. Had a little bit of coke but managed to get to bed at a reasonable hour so was fine in work today. Strangely enough I didnt really get the afternoon fatigue today which is quite ironic!


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

On a school night? :nono: I couldn't do that! I used to though mind...booze that is...never done coke.

Heard from addaction yet?


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

I was quite strategic with my drinking and coke so that I made sure I got a decent sleep! Only had a little but of coke anyway.

No not heard addiction which is unbelievably crap.

So tired today. Decent shoulder and tris session today so going to have an early night tonight and a long sleep!


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Have you called addaction? I had to chase my key worker up and seeing him tomorrow now. I will comment on his poor communication with me though.


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

I've been so busy with work Ive barely had a chance. Might try and call them tomorrow or something. I'm so annoyed with them that I don't know whether to try someone else. Will be 3 weeks on Friday.

I did call them last Monday and they said they would get in touch but didn't


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> I've been so busy with work Ive barely had a chance. Might try and call them tomorrow or something. I'm so annoyed with them that I don't know whether to try someone else. Will be 3 weeks on Friday.
> 
> I did call them last Monday and they said they would get in touch but didn't


Do you know of any other suitable services in the area?


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Not really looked Katy - Been so busy lately. Might have a look over the weekend as Ive all but given up hope on them getting in touch now. Don't want a service where I feel like I am hassling them.

Just having a beer tonight actually. Only bought 6 cos its been a pretty hectic week both in work and outside of it and they are going down well. Starting to look forward to the weekends again which is really good  N

Good back and biceps session today. Pumps are starting to get pretty unbearable now from the deca so gonna swap for a rip blend and start dieting very soon. I've gained a bit too much weight on the belly so need to drop some. Water should go as the deca leaves my system so should experience fairly rapid weightloss quickly if I can curb my eating. Being back in an office is terrible for snacking as there is always stuff being passed around and its hard to say no!

Doing pretty well on the whole so a bit happier generally. Getting paid tomorrow will be a bonus! Shame im £250 overdrawn on my business account!


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Glad you're looking forward to the weekend. Me too! Sounds like work is doing you good


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Yep I plan on going straight to the pub after work today and staying there for some time! LOL

First pay day euphoria!!

Joking aside though I will drink today and tomorrow but try to give it a miss on Sunday. Paid a fair few bills today so that I didn't have too much spare cash in my account otherwise I know what will happen!

I know this afternoon is going to drag.

Im quite impressed with myself that this is the first time I have logged into UKM in work. 9 days I have managed!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Well a savage weekend on the booze on drugs. Not drinking today though so will hit the gym tomorrow. Diet starts tomorrow and I have dropped Test/deca in favour of a rip blend

After my 4 month layoff I was down to about 17.5-18 stone. Ran Test and deca for about 12 weeks and am currently 20 stone now dead but quite watery and bloated. Some pics to follow shortly. Will keep updating them every few weeks.

Hoping to get back to under 18


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Pics at 20 stone. Lot of water and fat to come off. I think my ideal weight would be about 17 stone.


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Nice one for getting pics up hun...you can now start to monitor your progress from those.


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

They really aren't flattering but I need something to go on! When I look in the mirror its a completely different look to how I seem to look on photographs. Ah well.

Going to stop drinking so much beer and have spirits instead! Must be consuming an insane amount of caloirues through beer. On a quiet week I have about 40 beers which must be 10,000 calories at least!


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

What beers do you drink and how big are the cans?

Careful with spirits though hun...it's far easier to consume more units on them! I used to just bosh it faster than it took affect and then end up totally fvcked!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Drink Carlberg Export and stella cans mainly 440ml cans most of the time.

Its a bit of a catch 22 cos if I keep drinking beer I stay really fat but if I go on spirits I can get in some horrendous states!

Sick of feeling bloated though so think I will take the risk on spirits. Will probably go to the pub and have 3/4 pints before moving to spirits. Better than drinking 20 pints!


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Ok, so yeah, 40 cans of that is 7,440 kcals. 'tis a lot! Are you planning on quitting at any point?


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Don't really want to quit completely as I really enjoy it. Just need to slow my pace down a bit. Was in the pub the other day and my friend timed me drinking (without me realising) and I was getting through 5 pints an hour!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

First cardio session for months today. A fairly modest 4kms on the treadmill. Normally do more but I'm already tired enough in work these days without adding too it. Still eating too much crap though. Will just have to gradually change the diet rather than do anything drastic. problem is with snacking as opposed to my proper meals which are pretty healthy. High protein low carbs


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Just a bit of back today in the gym. Trying not to go overboard on the sessions because of the fatigue thing. Was almost sleeping in a meeting earlier. Bought some pro plus this morning which I will be eating like sweets throughout the day! Going to try and sleep absolutely loads over the weekend and see if it helps!


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

No training this morning and the work related fatigue is nowhere near as bad, even though I was drinking last night. I wouldn't say I am training excessively but my body is obviously thinking differently


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Approx half a stone off in week 1. Actually a bit more but as I drank last night Im allowing for a few lbs through dehydration!

Got pretty smashed last night so off to the pub shortly. Hope its open. Really hoped to sleep in today but typically I woke at the crack of dawn!


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> Approx half a stone off in week 1. Actually a bit more but as I drank last night Im allowing for a few lbs through dehydration!
> 
> Got pretty smashed last night so off to the pub shortly. Hope its open. Really hoped to sleep in today but typically I woke at the crack of dawn!


Going to the pub at 10am?

Well done on the weight loss though hun. Anything planned for the weekend?


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Weekend has been crazy. So ashamed. Will tell all privately sometime


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## Hera (May 6, 2011)

Irish Beast said:


> Weekend has been crazy. So ashamed. Will tell all privately sometime


Shall I be expecting a PM hun? Everything ok?


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## Irish Beast (Jun 16, 2009)

Not gonna be posting in this journal any more peeps. Unfortunately my demons have gotten the best of me and I can't overcome them. No point constantly moaning about it on here! Getting nowhere with the gym so no point in recording stuff when I am not going to change my ways. Making little or no progress!

Thanks to those of you who have dropped by 

Over and out

IB


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## Fatboy80 (Feb 27, 2008)

Irish Beast said:


> Not gonna be posting in this journal any more peeps. Unfortunately my demons have gotten the best of me and I can't overcome them. No point constantly moaning about it on here! Getting nowhere with the gym so no point in recording stuff when I am not going to change my ways. Making little or no progress!
> 
> Thanks to those of you who have dropped by
> 
> ...


That's the spirit!


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